Hero
by Ms. Padfoot
Summary: Severus Snape is sent on a mission to America the summer before 6th, with some unexpected results.
1. Prologue

Hero

Prologue

Severus Snape, Potions Master and Professor, stood in his customary, intimidating, manner. His back was ramrod straight, and his broad shoulders were squared. His eyes were glaring intensely, and a menacing sneer was firmly in place. His arms were crossed tightly over his chest, until the last student warily filed from the classroom. With a weary wave of his hand, the door slid closed, and locked behind the child with a soft click. If one were to have taken a closer look, they would have seen that that hand was trembling.

He stepped up onto the small dais, and slid bonelessly into his chair. He sighed heavily as he leaned his elbows on the desk, and shoved his fingers through his hair, resting his head in his palms. He closed his eyes, and his shoulders slumped in exhaustion.

Both masters had kept him hopping for weeks. His duties demanded more and more of his time, to the point that he was foregoing sleep in order to keep up the momentum in his classes.

Despite what many perceived to be a hatred for his job, and the students that he taught, Severus actually loved his job. He was good at it, despite his rather harsh teaching methods. He knew his craft, and his harshness was borne out of frustration due to his students lack of understanding of the beauty in what he was trying to teach them.

He opened his bleary eyes, and slowly focused on the parchments before him. Today's essays. He started to read the first few lines of the top page, and Harry Potter's neat scrawl suddenly swam, and then danced in a jumbled riot of loops and swirls.

Severus blinked hard, and tried to clear his vision when the letters rearranged themselves into little stick people that lined up across the page, and shook their spindly stick fists at him. "I've got to quit doing this or it's going to kill me." He muttered under his breath, shoving the offensive paper to the bottom of the stack. He rammed the heels of his hands into his eye sockets, and scrubbed at them furiously, in a vain attempt to clear his vision. "The next time Albus asks me to 'run a little errand' for him, I must refuse." He grumbled to himself. "I just can not do anymore!"

He dragged himself to his feet, never more thankful that his day was over. He staggered to his private chambers, and kicked off his heavy boots. He peeled his soiled teaching robes from his lean frame, and tossed them into a charmed basket that automatically sent them to the house elves for cleaning.

He poured himself a small glass of sherry, and sank into his favourite, worn, leather armchair. He stretched his long legs out before the fire, and sighed heavily once more. "I think I will just close my eyes for a bit before dinner." He murmured as his lids slipped over his eyes, and shut out the world. Within minutes, he dropped into a heavy, exhausted, slumber.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Severus' boss, and friend, had fire-called the young wizard, intending to send him to Grimmauld Place with a message for Remus Lupin. When he looked into the sitting room of Severus' private quarters, and saw the man sleeping soundly, he didn't have the heart to disturb him.

He knew, and appreciated, all that Severus was so willing to give. He was also well aware of the strain being put on the young man in recent weeks. He knew that Voldemort was calling upon him more frequently, and the poor boy came back each time, a little more beaten, a little more broken, but determined, more than the times before, to complete his mission before retiring to his rooms or the infirmary. Albus also sadly noted, that those times, under Poppy's watchful eye, were on the increase as well. The boy was exhausted, dangerously so.

Even through that exhaustion, Severus held sway over his classes in his usual, forceful, manner. Albus was aware of that as well, and concerned for 'one of his own', his general health and welfare, he let the young man sleep. He charmed the man's quarters to keep all disturbances at bay, ensuring that Severus would be left alone until the morning.

Albus pondered the dilemma he was facing where Severus was concerned. He made up his mind that the young man needed a break away from Hogwart's, and the demands put upon him by his duty to the Order of the Phoenix, at the very least. But, Albus also knew Severus extremely well. There was no way he would convince the man to simply take a much needed vacation. No, he knew he would have to send Severus on a mission for the Light. It was the only way that he could be sure to at least give Severus a break away from his responsibilities to Hogwart's, and the Order. Voldemort was out of Albus' sphere of influence, of course, but he would have to leave that up to Severus to manage. Nodding in satisfaction, his plan in mind, he ended his day.

* * *

When classes had concluded for the summer the following week, Severus made his way to the tower office of the Headmaster, pondering the reasons there might be for such a summons. None of them were appealing in the least, and he sighed in resignation, preparing himself for the inevitable.

"Ah, Severus." The old wizard greeted, sounding greatly relieved to see the younger man. "Another school year closes, and I find myself in need of your expertise once again."

"As ever, I am happy to serve, Headmaster." Severus bowed wearily, sighing inwardly, and shot a mild glare toward the framed portrait of Phineas Nigellus Black, when he heard a mildly derisive snort coming from the canvas above his head. "What do you require of me, Sir?"

"I have been receiving confusing reports from the United States concerning recent activities there which may be of great concern to the Light." Albus gravely gave an account as he came to settle in his chair. He lifted a parchment, and read the words inscribed upon it, handing it over to the younger wizard, and allowing him to read what was written there. "While our initial reports indicate that all is quiet, recently there have been rumours to the contrary. I would like for you to agree to give it your personal attention."

Severus drew a deep breath through his nose, tilted his chin, and narrowed his calculating eyes in the Headmaster's direction. Albus gazed back at him steadily, his mild-mannered demeanour never wavering. "What sort of rumours", Severus demanded haltingly, knowing full well he'd do whatever the old man required him to do, no matter what his answer to the question would be. "and contrary to what?"

"I dont know!" Albus mildly exclaimed, sounding baffled. "Which is why I would like to send you there. You're the only one I would trust with such a mission, Severus. You're the one who would be able to see things that others would overlook!"

"What manner of _things_, Albus?" Severus snapped, not pleased with the vagary of his explanations.

"I need you to go there, my boy, and keep your eyes and ears open to any signs of trouble." Albus explained, leaning back in his chair with his twinkling, blue-eyed, gaze on full beam.

"Trouble from whom?" Severus snarled, sounding disgruntled by the lack of information.

"Ah ha." Albus replied, holding up one long, gnarled finger, and earning himself an intense glare from the black-eyed man before him.

"As you wish, Sir." Severus growled in resignation, rising to leave. "I shall leave tomorrow morning." With another bow, he swept from the room, his dissatisfaction showing in every snap of his robes as he stalked from the room.

"Well, that went better than I'd hoped, gentlemen." Albus addressed the portraits surrounding him, and they nodded in familiar agreement, but for one.

"You're going to be sorry you messed with the boy, Albus. Mark my words." Phineas declared with a superior sniff as he left his frame.

* * *

Those among us who were fortunate, or cursed, enough to know Albus Dumbledore, soon learned that it did one no good to question his motives. He wouldn't reveal his reasons for his actions unless he felt it necessary to do so in order to bend you to his will. Severus considered himself fortunate to know him, although there were times over the course of his life that he was tempted to question his own sanity.

Years ago, as a mere child, Severus had escaped what he thought was a tormented existence, only to find that he had stepped into something far worse. From the day he realized his mistake, and ran, begging for forgiveness, to the Headmaster, he knew he owed his life to the man whom he often referred to with great affection as, 'the barmy old coot'.

Albus Dumbledore gave him sanctuary; a home, an education, an income, and a purpose in his life. But, he gave him so much more than that. He gave his unwavering trust, and an opportunity for Severus to redeem himself. In return, Severus gave him unwavering loyalty. Both men knew there was nothing Albus could ask of Severus that he wouldn't do without question...er...well...without too many questions. Most times, those questions went unanswered, and Severus was graced with Albus' insufferable, twinkling, blue-eyed gaze.

But Severus had vowed to never disappoint the great wizard again, and for this reason, he now found himself here, in this godforsaken place, on this godforsaken continent, because Albus-bloody-Dumbledore asked him to do this. He found himself stuck here, in America, out of his element, living amongst Muggles, and loathing every moment of it. He felt clueless as to what benefit being there could offer the Order, or the wizarding world as a whole, but, Albus ordered it, he would make it so.

His first nightly, narrative to his pensieve upon arrival clearly indicated his feelings on the matter at hand.

***_I am Severus Snape, and I am a wizard. I am Potion's Master at Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I am a former Death Eater, and I am a spy, serving as Second Lieutenant to the Order of the Phoenix. I don't know what in the Hell I am supposed to learn from insinuating myself into the everyday existence, and going's on, of a shelter for battered women. But as I said, I am a spy, and what do we do best? We insinuate ourselves, and we watch...and wait***_


	2. Arrival In America

Arrival in America

I arrived at my destination early one absurdly bright, and annoyingly cheerful morning in answer to an uncannily convenient advertisement, placed in a local newspaper. My nose twitched suspiciously as the whole business reeked of Albus' manipulations, and he had not given me anything concrete that would explain his reasons for sending me here.

For this assignment, I had been dispatched to America, cloyingly nicknamed, "The Melting Pot". This, of course, giving a false impression that all were welcome to her shores. All, that is, but for those of my kind. The signature should have read, "The Melting Pot for Muggles". Wizard-kind was just as outcast, and feared, here, as it was at home.

I had arrived in a rather large city, namely, Bay City. I assumed this simplistic moniker to be as a result of being situated near a small inland bay on the thumb side of the state of Michigan. How utterly mundane. I muttered sarcastically to myself.

The address I was led to, revealed a very large, run-down, manor house on a busy, tree-lined avenue, just as quaintly named as the town, Center Avenue. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes, and snort. In its heyday, the home had no doubt been beautiful. Now, however, it was in serious need of repair, and restoration. I began assessing its needs as soon as I rang the bell, relieved to hear that it, at least, was functional, despite being a little out of tune.

A tall, older woman, with steel grey hair, sleepy blue eyes, and a hawkish face, answered after the first ring. "May I help you?" She inquired as she stifled a wide yawn. Her voice was rather pleasant, and her visage changed remarkably as a smile graced her face.

"I apologize for the early call, madam." I bowed slightly. "I wish to inquire about the position for a handyman which was posted in the Times. Might it still be available?"

She eyed me critically, from tip to toe, before answering. "The position is still open. Would you care to come in, and discuss it, Mr?"

"Robinson." I supplied without hesitation, my alias well-planned in advance. "Devon Robinson."

"Welcome to the Lighthouse, Mr. Robinson." She said as she ushered me inside. "My name is Alberta Johnson, but you may call me Al if you like."

"Alberta will be fine." I smiled briefly, and inspected my shabby surroundings. She led me down a long, dark corridor, that ran from the front of the manor to the back. The walls were covered in a dark red, tattered, velvet-embossed paper, the woodwork was painted glossy, dark brown. Tarnished brass wall sconces provided dim illumination. It too, in its heyday, must have been grand to see, but now it was merely gaudy, and depressing.

We passed through a battered door that led into a massive kitchen. This room appeared to be a bit more cheerful. The furnishings were worn, but it was apparent that the room had undergone more recent modernization when compared to the deplorable state of the hallway beyond.

"Would you care for some coffee, Mr. Robinson?" She asked, reaching for the carafe as she directed me to take a seat at a small table, near a large window that looked out on an overgrown back garden. My fingers were itching to get out there immediately as I spotted a few weeds that would serve as fresh ingredients for a simple healing salve.

"Coffee would be acceptable." I said, and received a sharp look. "You are welcome to call me Devon, if you wish, and I will take that coffee black." I added hastily.

"You always so formal, Dev?" She asked as she placed a steaming mug before me.

I bristled at the use of the shortened version of my name, even if it was not my real name. I abhor nicknames due to one I was cursed with in the past. "Please, call me Devon. I reiterated. I prefer it."

"You're a stiff one, arent you?" She laughed quietly, and shook her head. "Okay, Devon it is. What brings you to America, Devon?"

"What makes you think that something has brought me here?" I parried warily, always alert to anyone showing suspicion toward me.

"Hmm...like to hold your cards close to your vest, too, I see." Her eyes twinkled merrily as she let it drop. I merely waited, and sipped my coffee. "Do you have any experience with this sort of work?" She asked next, offering a plate of pastries.

"A fair amount." I smiled, refusing the offer with a slight shake of my head. "I have not had my place cave in on me at any rate." I smiled to myself as she visibly relaxed with the change in my demeanour.

"Do you know what we do here, Mr...Devon?" She asked quietly.

"I am not entirely sure." I replied misleadingly, not wanting to appear too well informed. "I am assuming, by the name, that you are some manner of half-way house?"

"The Lighthouse is a shelter for battered women and children, Devon." She replied softly. "You will see all manner of horrors come through these doors. We offer a safe place for these women and children to live, heal, and sort out where to go next. We get medical attention for those who need it. We feed them, clothe them, and give them a clean, comfortable bed to sleep in. The children have tutors that come in here to teach in order to protect them from abusive fathers. We have legal council for the women who need that as well. It is a sad place a lot of the time, but we have our happiness, too. Do you understand?"

"I understand." I nodded as I quietly answered, understanding all too well what these people needed.

"Are you married, Devon?" She asked, watching me carefully, assessing me, and no doubt, judging me.

"No. I have never married." I answered honestly, forcing myself to look directly at her, and give a small, dismissive shrug.

"So, you've no children, then, either." She stated matter-of-factly.

"Only my students." I briefly closed my eyes, and cursed my slip. I was going to have to be more careful. I found her too easy to open up to, and I had already told her too much about myself.

"Students?" She pounced, immediately interested.

I shifted uncomfortably, trying to decide how to handle the slip. I opted for as vaguely honest as I could make it. "Students." I repeated, nodding, and shifting in my seat. "I am a professor in a private boarding school in Scotland. I am spending my summer holidays here in the United States."

"I never would have taken you for a teacher." She admitted in surprise, taking another shrewd, assessing, look at me. "What do you teach, professor?" She smiled, a new gleam of approval in her eyes.

"Well, I suppose you could loosely describe it as Chemistry." I hedged uncertainly, scrambling for the proper Muggle references, and wondering why I did not fit her image of what a teacher should appear to be.

"Loosely describe?" Her eyebrow arched in surprise. "What do you do? Brew all manner of concoctions over a bubbling cauldron all day?"

I choked on my coffee, and when I had quit sputtering, I offered, with a forced laugh, a saving sally. "You have found me out!" She laughed good-naturedly, and changed the subject, and I breathed a small, discomforted, sigh of relief.

"What compensation would you require for this position?" She asked next, and I shifted closer to the table, giving her question careful consideration. I was not in need of anything monetarily, I had brought enough with me to last the summer. Not only that, from what I had observed since I had arrived, there was not any money here anyway. This was a struggling establishment, and knowing that, I made my decision.

"My needs are fairly simple." I leaned my forearms on the table. "I would require private quarters, away from the residents. Two meals a day. Sundays off, and noon to two, every day, for a midday meal. I will see to that myself. I will use that time to attend to my personal business as well. I will work from eight in the morning until noon, and then from two in the afternoon until dinner hour in the evening. I will also give two hours every evening to discuss progress, and any requirements we may have for further projects, when it is needed." I sat back in my chair, and allowed her to think over what I had said.

"And your wage requirements?" She inquired.

"I do not require monetary compensation." I answered bluntly.

"I must pay you something for your work!" She exclaimed incredulously.

"Madam, I do not need money." I retorted sharply. "If you feel you require that I am compensated in this manner, then I wish for my wage to be directly transferred back into this establishment."

"You must be heaven-sent, Mr. Robinson." She whispered softly, her eyes swimming in tears. "For surely, you are an angel."

"I assure you, I am no angel." I scoffed mildly. "But, I will help you to the best of my ability while I am here. I must return for school at the end of August."

"When can you start?" She asked, dabbing at her eyes with the corner of her napkin.

"I will start at two this afternoon, if you will show me to my room, and allow me to settle in." I informed her.

"Actually, I can do better than a room, Devon." She flashed a watery smile. "There is a small guest house out back that you are welcome to use. I will tell you that it needs work as well. You are welcome to a room here in the main house until you make your place presentable."

"Thank you, Alberta." I replied quietly, and her eyes narrowed shrewdly as she assessed me once more. "Would you point the way, and I will get to it?"

A short time later, I stood in the middle of the great room of a rather run down guest house. There were broken windowpanes, cracked, and chipped plaster, and no curtains on the windows. The loo, and the kitchenette, were in a deplorable state, and the whole place was dank, and musty smelling. Of all the rooms, the small bedroom was the most presentable in the place. I noted that with a good airing, a thorough cleaning, and a fresh coat of paint, it would be fine. I started there, and by noon, I at least had a place that was very comfortable to sleep in. It would take several evenings to take care of the rest, even if I did slip in a little magical assistance.

I was busily working on the back side of the house early the next morning, when a commotion from the front caught my attention. I brushed my hands on my jeans, and made my way around the side of the house to investigate. I took in the scene, carefully observing what everyone was doing and saying, before I stepped forward, and made my presence known.

A rather large, and extremely ugly man, with a face that reminded me of a Pug, had a firm grip on a thin woman with one hand, and Alberta with the other. Two small children were clinging in terror to their horrified mother. Alberta wore a cool expression, and spoke quietly, but I could tell she was frightened as well.

"Is there a problem here?" I asked, quietly stepping forward, rage burning in my chest as I thought of the brutality in my past, and associated it with this helpless woman and her children. I had instantly drawn everyones attention. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw several residents watching from the front parlour windows.

"There's no problem here." The man belligerently declared, his voice slurred. I jerked my head, and took half a step back as the smell of liquor on his breath assaulted my super-sensitive nose. "My wife and kids were just leaving." He growled, jerking on her so violently that she cried out, and the little boy fell to the ground. His sister bent, and helped him to his feet.

"If there is no problem, then I would ask you to unhand these women at once." I requested mildly enough, but the warning was clear.

He immediately released Alberta's arm, and she stepped closer to me, happy to let me handle the situation. He kept a firm grip on the woman, and I let him go for the time being. Her terrified eyes were pleading with me, but, I needed more time.

I focused my attention on the children, and I was instantly enraged. I kept my expression impassive, but I had already vowed, that if I had the chance, I was going to wreak a little vengeance on their behalf, before this man left our presence.

The little girl, possibly as old as six, was sporting a rather large bruise on the right side of her face. There were traces of dried blood on her chin from a split lip. It was swollen, and inflamed, and the potential for infection was evident. She was crying, and shaking violently. I forced what I hoped was an encouraging smile in her direction, but she was too terrorized to respond.

The little boy was perhaps three, maybe four years old. I quickly assessed his injuries. The blood trickling from his ear was causing the most concern. I hoped that it was only a minor injury. He would need medical attention immediately. The little fellow was so traumatized, he was not even crying. I assumed he was in shock.

"Alberta, take the children inside, and get them something to drink." I ordered quietly, without taking my eyes from the parents. The man looked as if he were about to protest, but I raised my eyebrow, and tilted my head in challenge, and he remained silent. I smiled to myself. 'He's mine.' I thought smugly with immense satisfaction. I was going to enjoy this.

The woman wore a look of immediate relief, and gratitude, no doubt comforted to know that her children were safe from any further harm. I wanted them out of the line of fire. I had a feeling things were about to get ugly, and I mentally prepared myself for the impending physical fight. This monster was the type to resort to brute force. The evidence was clearly visible for all to see on his family members faces, and I was more than ready to take him down.

"Come along, children." Alberta called softly, smiling sympathetically, and holding out her hands to them. "We'll go, and have a nice, cold, glass of lemonade. Would you like that?" The little ones nodded quietly, and looked to their mother, waiting for reassurance from her.

"Go ahead, babies." She smiled encouragingly. "This nice lady will take care of you." With that quiet guarantee, they each took one of Alberta's hands, and she quickly led them into the house. The first step had been passed. The children were out of harm's way. Now for the woman.

"I asked you once, quite politely in fact, to let her go." I said calmly, turning to face them, and nodding in the woman's direction. "I know you understood me perfectly well. I must insist that you release her immediately, sir."

"And what if I don't?" He sneered, jerking on her arm again. She cried out in pain, and I looked more closely at her arm. It was as I suspected, obviously broken. "Are you going to make me?"

"If that is what it will take, then, yes." I stated quietly, turning my attention back to the drunken bastard, and taking up the challenge. "I can...and will..._make_ you." The woman was frantically shaking her head, trying to warn me away from him, but she did not know me. She had no idea that I was fully capable of handling overgrown, drunken brutes like her husband. My father had given me plenty of opportunities to learn how to take care of myself.

My challenge was not taken very seriously by the Pug. "I'll pound your scrawny ass right into the ground!" He laughed derisively, staggering off-balance, and causing the woman to begin crying in pain.

"I do not think you can." I taunted mockingly. I am thin, but at 168 cm. and 14 stone, I can hardly be considered scrawny. Not only that, I train as often as time allows me to, and I am quite capable of taking care of myself in a physical fight.

The woman was in a near-blind panic as she feared for my safety. Her eyes were wide, and her pupils were fully dilated. I assumed that to be reaction to her abuse and pain. She was shaking her head in warning, but the taunt had the desired effect on the man. He was now focused entirely on me, and he had let go of her arm. I jerked my head toward the house, and she raced for the safety of its walls.

He made to grab her as she passed, and I stepped forward, ordering with a low snarl, "Leave her be. You are going to answer to me."

He turned on me, a murderous expression on his face, as he realized he had been goaded into doing what I wanted. With a roar of rage, he lunged at me, reaching for my throat. When I easily side-stepped his advance, slapping his fist away, it only served to enrage him all the more. He came at me like a rampaging hippogriff, throwing his arms around me, and taking me to the ground. As I fought my way to my feet, he caught me squarely in the jaw with a right hook that sent me sprawling again. I felt the bones crunch as they snapped, and I quelled the instant wave of nausea as I staggered to my feet.

I heard someone in the house scream my name in alarm when he came at me again. I vaguely wondered if he might have been right about giving me a pounding as he hit me right in the nose. He punched me a few more times before I managed to duck a left uppercut, sending him off-balance once more, allowing me just enough time to ready my assault. I got in a few solid hits before he knocked me to the ground once again. I came to my feet, staggering back enough to be out of reach, and struggling to catch my breath.

When he came lumbering at me, I was ready for him, and effectively brought him to his knees by giving him a beautifully executed jab, with two fingers to his larynx. He dropped heavily to the ground with a grunt, gasping for breath. I finished him off with a roundhouse punch to his ugly mug that knocked him flat on his back, more due to his inebriation, than my force. I had to admit, if only to myself, that had he been sober, I would have been in serious trouble.

I moved off a few yards to his side, falling to my hands and knees in the grass, struggling to regain my composure as I dispassionately watched the blood drip from my nose. I heard sirens approaching from the distance, and felt an odd mixture of regret and relief. I had been blinded by rage, and would have gladly killed the bastard if it would not have been for the thought of all those little faces, peering out the front windows, bearing witness.

Alberta was by my side in an instant, helping me to stand. "Devon, are you seriously hurt? Do you need a doctor?" She asked, her voice quavering unsteadily, and concern in her deep blue eyes as she wiped blood from my face with a soft cloth.

"I will be fine." I reassured her, feeling my jaw for injuries, and holding the cloth to my bloody, but thankfully, unbroken nose.

"Are you sure you don't need a doctor?" She asked again, rubbing my back comfortingly.

"No, no doctor." I grimaced in pain. "Some ice might be a good idea. This is swelling fast." I immobilized my jaw with my hand. I would fix it as soon as I was alone.

"I'll get you some ice right away." She replied, wrapping her arm around me, and leading me inside. She issued orders for the officer, who had just arrived, to follow us into the house. "I had Cassie watch while I tended to the children. She saw your signal, and called the police." Alberta added quietly as the officer approached.

I had been flashing our hand signal, informing someone to call in an emergency, all the while I had been talking to the abusive husband. We make a ring with our thumb and forefinger, and hold our remaining fingers straight down. Then we flash a forefinger twice...9-1-1. It was something every resident knew, even the smallest of the children. We included it along with the regular lessons that were taught on a daily basis.

My attention re-focused on the moment at hand, and I was uncomfortable with the fact that Alberta was touching me in such a familiar way, but forced myself to tolerate it for the time being. Before the contact could become unbearable for me, she moved away, and sat in the chair opposite me as I gave my report to the policeman who had come into the house with us.

The woman's husband was arrested for being drunk and disorderly, and taken away by the police after everyone was questioned. If further charges were to be brought against him, they would be up to his wife. I was released from charges being brought against me, when it was made obvious that I had acted in self-defence, while trying to get the woman and her children to safety. I was informed that I could press assault charges against him if I chose, and I informed the officers that I would consider it, and let them know.

Alberta went to work, settling the family into their own quarters. A doctor had been called to the house to see to their injuries. I refused care, and Cassie volunteered to take the woman to hospital in order for her arm to be set in a plaster cast. I tried not to roll my eyes at the primitive methods they employed, knowing that I would have been able to set her to rights in a few moments had I the freedom to use my skills. I was relieved to learn that the little chap merely had a small cut that made it appear as if he were bleeding from his ear. The little girl was treated for her injuries, and given medicines to make her more comfortable.

I offered a small pot of the healing salve I had made with the herbs I found growing in the overgrown flowerbeds in back. Alberta's curiosity as to my teaching expertise was satisfied as she smiled, and remarked casually, "Loosely describe, indeed. Devon you're into herbal medicines!" Despite my ability to offer a topical treatment, I wished for the familiarity of my potions, and the freedom to use them. The entire family would be whole, and pain-free, within hours if I were to have the freedom to ply my craft.

Alberta had urged me to take the rest of the afternoon off, but I was nearly finished with repairing some of the trim in the back, and I wanted to take care of that before I quit for the day. First, I went back to my little house, which I had managed to make quite comfortable. I repaired my damaged jaw, but left the swelling, and the bruises, and returned to my work.

The remainder of the day passed quietly, and I retired to my home to read for a while before calling it a day. I was just beginning to doze in my chair when a soft knock sounded on the door. Alberta was standing on my front porch, with a small loaf of what appeared to be a sweet bread of some sort.

"I wanted to say thank you." She smiled, handing me the gift. "I made this tonight. It's banana nut bread. I hope you like it."

"It is one of my favourites." I assured her. "Would you like to come in?"

"I'd love to, if its alright?" She asked, and stepped inside as I gestured for her to enter.

"Would you care for some tea?" I asked, stepping over to the kitchenette, and putting the kettle on. "The real thing, too, I might add." I teased with a grin that faltered when she looked at me strangely for a brief moment.

"I'd love a cup of the real thing." She replied, and added with a laugh, "We do have a lot to learn here about the fine art of brewing tea. The British have one over on us for sure there!"

"So I have come to understand." I remarked dryly, and added in mock outrage, "To think you thought it wise to toss it into the sea! Really!" She laughed, and sat on my sofa, watching me move about the room. "Actually, it is because no one here takes the time." I explained with a nonchalant shrug. "There is more to it than plopping a bag in a cup, and pouring boiling water over it." I shook my head as I sliced some of the freshly baked bread, and placed it on a tray with the other items for tea. I carried the tray over, and sat it on the low table before my chair, and began to show her just how it should be done.

"You know, Dev, you..." She began, and I looked at her sharply in warning. "Devon." She amended, and shook her head wryly. "You would be hard-pressed to find a man here in America that would do something like this, let alone know how!" She indicated the tray of food and tea.

"It is just the way I was raised." I shrugged inelegantly, surprisingly, completely at ease in my new environment. I was able to let down my guard, and allow a little more of my true self to shine through, due to my anonymity. "Actually, my mother was one to stand on formality, and all of the old customs were taught, and strictly abided by in my home. I hope it does not surprise you too much to learn that we Brits, for the most part, plop a bag of Tetley's in a cup, and pour away." I smiled conspiratorially, and winked.

"I never would have guessed." She smiled, and took the cup I offered. "If that is the case, then why go through all of this formality? For my benefit?" She asked after taking a tentative sip.

I took a deep breath, and sighed. "I suppose it gives me pleasure to do something special, take a little extra care, and make an extra effort for a guest or a friend." I took a sip of my tea, and offered her the plate of bread.

She shook her head, refusing the offer, and said, "That's for you. Devon. What you did today was either very gallant or very stupid. I haven't decided yet. But I wanted you to know how much I appreciated your help. I was so worried for those children!"

"Are they settled?" I asked quietly, stifling a sudden yawn.

"Yes, Cassie helped to bathe the children before she went home, and I found them some pyjamas." She smiled. "After a nice hot meal, and a bowl of ice cream, the little ones were more than ready for bed."

"And the woman?" I cursed myself for caring, but I had to be sure they all felt safe.

"She's coping well enough." Alberta watched me quietly. "It's unsettling, isn't it? To see the circumstances under which they come to us. We're that last bastion of hope, and we try to set them on their way, healthy and safe. It doesn't always end up that way. So many of them have a hard time breaking completely away, and actually end up going back."

"Why on Earth would they want to go back?" I exclaimed, disbelievingly. I knew I never regretted leaving home when I had. I am quite sure that my father would have killed me if I had not. I often wondered if my mother had stayed with him simply because she preferred his company to mine, despite his abuse. An indisputable fact of my birth was that I was not wanted or loved by either of my parents. I was an unwelcome burden, and reminded of it, almost daily, my entire childhood.

"It's unnerving, but the reason they go back is because it's familiar, and less frightening than that big unknown world out there." Alberta answered sadly, drawing me out of my dark musings. "We do what we can to keep them free from the abusive lifestyle, but many of them are so beaten down, they no longer have the strength to truly break away."

"That does make a lot of sense." I murmured, almost to myself, remembering my mother, and earning another strange look from Alberta. My mind had slipped back to my own abused childhood, and the struggle I faced when it came time for me to make my break. My mother had never managed it, but I sent up a prayer of thanks to whatever deity had shown me the way to Albus Dumbledore.

"Well, I've taken up enough of your evening." She said, getting to her feet. "Enjoy the bread, Devon. I'll see you in the morning."

"Thank you for the bread. It is delicious." I snapped myself out of my musings, and escorted her to the door. "Goodnight, Alberta. Thank you for the company. I will see you in the morning."

I watched her walk across the lawn, and enter the house. I waited until she had turned off the back porch light before turning off my own lights, and heading off to bed. I lie awake for a long time, thinking over the events of the day, and tried to figure out why Albus wanted me here. I was not finding any reason for it. I had not felt any magical presence at all since I had arrived. I had not felt Voldemort's presence, nor had I been summoned. I could not see where it had anything to do with me. I had battled, and defeated, all of my demons concerning my abused childhood as far as I could tell. None of it made any sense to me, and I hated when things did not make sense!


	3. Attached

****

Ch 2 Attached

It was closer to August when things began to change around the old house. Suddenly, many of our residents were ready to leave, and strike out on their own. Cassie and Alberta soon found themselves with a lot of time on their hands, and begged me to set them to work. I gladly accepted their help, and the exterior of the manor was soon pulled together, and looking like the stately home of its heyday.

I had finished the repairs to the gingerbread trim, and the three of us had painted for the better part of a week, bringing the old home to its former glory. Cassie brought her brothers, and their friends, and we made a full day of removing dead trees and shrubbery, and replanting the beds surrounding the grounds.

Our work then moved to the interior of the home, and we spent long, hot days, stripping old wallpaper, and old varnish, scrubbing windows and floors, scraping old paint, repairing cracked plaster, and cracked window panes.

One evening, we were diligently working in the front parlour, during a rather nasty thunderstorm, when I heard a child calling for help. I peered out of the window, and with the next flash of lightening, I could see them in the front garden. I rushed out the front door, and down the steps into the driving rain.

With the next flash of lightening, I made out that it was a small girl, struggling to help a woman back onto her feet to no avail. I hurried over, and by the time I scooped the woman into my arms, I was already soaked through to my skin. The woman was unconscious, the child nearly in hysterics.

"Follow me, child." I ordered calmly, and turned to the house. The little girl, running to keep up with me, rushed to tell me how her Daddy had hit her Mommy with a baseball bat, and how she had steered the car while her Mommy tried to keep it going. It was then that I turned, and noticed the vehicle, half on the curb out front, still running. I sent Cassie out to move it around back.

"Al!" I shouted as I came in the door, not even realizing I had used the shortened version she had offered when I had come to this place. "We need an ambulance!"

She came around the corner, waving her arm, already on the phone to emergency services. I heard her give the address to the dispatcher as I moved down the hall to a clean room.

I gently placed the unconscious woman on the bed, and peeled her hair away from her face. I swallowed, and closed my eyes on the flood of memories. She looked as my mother had on so many occasions; bruised, and as pale as death, more often unconscious as the years passed, and I continued to survive. Yes, he blamed her for it, and punished her as often as he had me. I shifted uncomfortably as my memories washed over me, and rage blossomed in my chest.

A need to protect her overcame me, and when Alberta entered with a basin of water, and a soft cloth, she looked startled when I took them from her, and began to clean the woman's face myself. But she did not say a word. She left to attend to the little girl, and reassure her that her Mum was going to be alright. Cassie led the EMT's into the room several moments later, and they set to work on the woman immediately.

I stood back against the wall, and watched them work, never taking my eyes from them for a moment. For some reason, I felt it was imperative that I hold some form of contact. It was determined that she needed to be hospitalised, and I stepped forward to say I would accompany her.

"Devon, you don't have to do that!" Alberta exclaimed. "I can go with her. You've been working all day!"

"I will go." I repeated, and there was no arguing with my tone. I left them to finish preparing the woman for the ride in the ambulance, and I went to seek out the little girl.

I took her hand, and led her to the kitchen. I settled her at the table with a bowl of ice cream. I took a deep breath, and crouched beside her. "My name is Devon." I smiled grimly. "What is yours?"

"Mommy says I'm not supposed to tell you that." She said quietly, turning her big blue eyes on me. "You're a stranger, and Mommy says strangers can be bad people."

"Your Mum is a very smart lady." I told her. "It is okay if you are not ready to tell me your name, child. You know mine, and that will be enough for now." I drew another deep breath, struggling to keep my tone light. I was not used to dealing with small children in this manner, or any other manner for that matter. My experience was limited to the students I taught, and that was not exactly the tone I needed at the moment.

"You talk funny, Devon." She declared with a tilt o her head. "Sort of like the lady on television that Mommy likes to watch. Only your voice is much nicer. Hers is screechy." She related with a repulsed shudder.

"I want you to listen to me." I said carefully, suppressing an urge to growl impatiently, and she nodded with a small frown of concentration as she studied my face. "Your Mum has to go to hospital for a while, but I do not want you to worry. Alberta and Cassie will take good care of you. I am going to go with your Mum, and make sure she is taken care of, too. Will that be acceptable to you?"

She did not say anything for several long moments. One fat teardrop fell into her ice cream bowl before she looked up at me, a flood of more tears ready to spill. "Is Mommy going to die? Daddy said he was going to kill her if she tried to leave, and take me, too."

I started as if I had been slapped, and rage burned in my brain. I wanted to tug the little urchin up close to me, but forced myself to remain calm. "No, child, your Mum is not going to die." I reassured her. "We will bring her home from hospital as soon as she is well enough to come back for you. You may stay here with us, where it is safe, and there are other children to play with. Does that sound enjoyable to you?"

She nodded, and turned to face me, swinging her legs over the side of the large, oak chair. "Are you an angel?" She asked, her eyes widening suddenly.

I snorted dismissively, somewhat taken aback by the question as it was the second time since I had arrived here that I was referred to in such a manner. "No, child, I am not an angel."

She looked shrewdly at me, and asked, "Are you sure? 'Cause you sure looked like you had wings, big black ones, when you were carrying my Mommy!" I felt rather unsettled all of a sudden, and could only stare at the little one before me. She leaned over, and threw her arms around my neck. Her little body was trembling, and I held her tight for a few moments, struggling not to push her out of my personal space. I made to rise, and she whispered in my ear, "My name is Danielle, but you can call me Dani if you want. I'm six years old. I like you, Devon, and I still think you're an angel."

"Alright, child." I smiled uneasily as I stood up. "I will be your angel, How would that be to you?"

She smiled brightly, and slipped her hand into mine as Alberta appeared in the doorway. She looked surprised to see the two of us behaving in such a close manner. I learned, later, that she had not been able to get Danielle to say a word.

"They're ready to go, Devon." She said softly.

I nodded, and crouched before Danielle. "I want you to be a big girl for me. Will you do that?" I asked her. She nodded solemnly. "I will let you know how your Mummy is doing when I get back, even if I have to wake you to do it. Does that sound acceptable to you?" She nodded again. "Good girl. I want you to go with Alberta. She will take care of you. She will help you with your bath, and find you some pyjamas to wear. I want you to try to go to sleep."

"I promise I'll be a good girl. I always try to be a good girl so Daddy won't get mad at us. Are you going to get mad at me if I'm not a good girl, and I can't sleep?" She asked curiously, fear brightening her eyes.

"No child. I would never be angry with you for not being sleepy." I reassured her. "I know you are very worried about your Mummy right now, and that it might be very hard for you to sleep. Do not worry, it will be fine if you are still awake when I return. I have to go with your Mummy now, but I will be back soon."

I passed her over to Alberta with a roll of my eyes, and a deep sigh. I hurried out to the waiting ambulance, and crawled in just as they were about to shut the doors.

* * *

I waited, impatiently, pacing the hall outside the emergency room. I did not understand what was taking so long, and even more than that, I did not understand why it really mattered to me.

Every few moments, I would pause in my pacing to stare through the small window. Sometimes, my view was blocked by a sister or a technician. There were few times I could see the woman lying on the bed.

She was still unconscious, pale, and unmoving, when I did manage a glimpse. There were all manner of tubes, and wires attached to her body, and it all looked rather horrifying to me. 'What I would not give for Madame Pomfrey!' I thought anxiously, not entirely trusting Muggle medical practices.

I backed away from the door as a short, blonde sister exited the room.

"Might you be able to tell me anything yet?" I asked anxiously, not sure why I felt such an urgent need to know, but passed it off to simply wanting to reassure Danielle when I returned home.

"Are you her husband?" The sister asked, her expression stony, her eyes flashing angrily.

"Mer...no!" I exclaimed, uncharacteristically stammering my explanations. "I..I work at the Lighthouse. She came to us tonight with her daughter, and I accompanied the ambulance. I do not even know her name!" I quickly explained.

She immediately relaxed, and offered an apologetic smile. "The doctor will be out shortly, and he will explain everything to you, Mr.?" She raised an eyebrow in question.

"Robinson." I supplied readily, breathing a sigh of relief as her expression warmed.

"Mr. Robinson." She acknowledged. "He'll be right out."

When she had walked away, I turned back to peer through the window. I went back to my pacing, growing more and more tense, and agitated, as the minutes slowly ticked by. Every time the door opened, I was instantly aware of it, searching for the doctor to emerge. I studied each face, looking for any indications that would give me a clue as to what the situation inside the room was, but they were no help at all. Some merely glanced at me as they hurried off, others glared, assuming the worst of me, and still others smiled in sympathy as they took note of my anxious state.

By the time the doctor finally emerged from the room, I was ready to explode. I rushed over to him, startling him out of his reverie. "Is she going to be alright?" I asked urgently.

He blinked at me, his expression grave, and did not answer straight away. He drew a deep breath. "Are you her husband?" He sounded rather angry, too, but I was already used to this first reaction from people.

"No, I do not even know her." I replied honestly. "My name is Devon Robinson, and I work for Alberta Johnson at the Lighthouse. This woman came in tonight with a small child. I accompanied the ambulance, so that I could know the situation, and better care for the child in her mothers absence."

He immediately straightened his posture when he heard my tone, and his whole attitude toward me shifted. "Mr. Robinson, I am familiar with the Lighthouse, and the work you do there. He smiled, and extended his hand. I took it readily, and looked back at the door to the woman's room."

"What can you tell me about her condition?" I asked solemnly. "Is she going to be alright?"

"She's been beaten quite severely with some sort of blunt instrument." He said quietly.

"Yes, a baseball bat." I replied absently, remembering what Danielle had told me earlier.

"That is consistent with her injuries." He nodded. "She will need to stay here for at least a couple of days."

"Has she regained consciousness at all?" I asked, stepping over to look through the small window again.

"No." He replied shortly. "But, I don't expect her to until sometime tomorrow. She's in shock, and has some internal damage. She's better off at the moment." I nodded silently in agreement.

"I know I have no right to any details", I began hesitantly. "but, is there anything else you can tell me?"

He studied me carefully for a few moments before stepping closer. "I have an office up the hall, Mr. Robinson. Perhaps you'd join me for a cup of coffee?" My shoulders relaxed in immediate relief as I nodded, and followed him down the hall.

"First of all", He began as he handed me a mug, and sat at his desk. "I don't want you to be alarmed by all of the tubes and wires attached to her. Her name is Rachel, by the way. One of the nurses removed a necklace with the name on it." He leaned forward, and cleared his throat. "The wires you see are merely monitoring her breathing and heart rate. The IV is providing fluids and nutrition her body needs to heal properly. The tubes in her nose are merely oxygen, which will also help with healing."

I slowly nodded, taking in all he was saying, and trying not to cringe when I thought of how utterly primitive it all was. My fingers itched as I wished for my wand, and some potions. The woman, Rachel, would be out of here in less than a day's time if I had my way.

"There is some bruising to her soft tissues, but nothing that requires anything more than the time to heal. She is very lucky." He commented. "Things could have gone quite a bit worse."

I took a sip from my mug, and waited. I could sense he had more to say on the matter. I suddenly felt a chill seep into my bones, and I just _knew_ what he was going to say next.

"She was pregnant." He said bluntly. "She lost the child."

I carefully set the mug on the desk before me, surprised to see that my hand was shaking. 'Why on Earth was this affecting me this way? It had nothing whatsoever to do with me!'

"Do you think she knew?" I asked, my voice hoarse and tense.

"She may not have. She wasn't very far along." He answered quietly. I nodded, and sat back in the chair, lost in my thoughts.

"I can't say for sure how long she will need to stay." He said softly. "It may be as long as a week. The authorities will need to be notified, but I will see to it that her child is left in Alberta's custody until she is well."

"Thank you." I replied absently, getting to my feet. "May I see her?" I asked, surprising both of us.

"Of course, but don't stay long." He smiled. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Robinson. I wish the circumstances could have been the same." He extended his hand once more, and I took it, noting the name on his lab coat.

"Thank you for taking the time to speak with me, Dr. Foster." I released his hand. "I appreciate your consideration."

"It wasn't a problem." He smiled again as he escorted me from his office. "I'll leave you to go back to her. I have another patient I need to check on at the moment. Perhaps I'll see you again."

"Good evening." I nodded, and made my way to the woman's room.

I paused outside the door, and peered through the glass. I shook my head in disbelief as I realized how small she appeared, how pale and fragile, as delicate as fine china. The whiteness of the room was stark, and sterile-looking, enhancing her pallor.

I silently entered the room, and came to stand close to the bed, just looking. I took in all of the wires and tubes, the flashing lights on the machinery, the strip of paper being spat from one of them. I was bewildered by it all, struggling to remember everything Dr. Foster had told me, and trying to understand what it all meant.

I turned my attention to the woman, and studied her face. Now that her hair was dry, I could see that it was a deep, honey blonde. She had long, curling eyelashes that fanned out over her pale cheeks, and her delicately arching eyebrows defined her face. I wondered idly if her eyes were the same deep blue as her daughter's. Despite the bruises marring her skin, she was a pretty woman, but I realized that she was not as young as she first appeared to be. I reached out to touch her face, snatching my hand back as a sister entered the room, and softly padded over to the bed. She inspected the machinery, wrote a few notes on the clipboard she had taken from a hook at the foot of the bed, and smiled at me.

I looked at her expectantly, waiting in silence for an update. "She's resting comfortably. She'll be out all night I would imagine. You might want to go home, and get some sleep. You can return tomorrow, and perhaps she will be awake then." She whispered quietly.

"Thank you. No." I stated firmly. "I will be staying here until she awakens." She nodded in understanding, and left as silently as she had entered.

I pulled a comfortable chair over by the bed, and settled into it, determined to wait for this woman to wake. I was unnerved by this compulsive urge. I _had_ to remain with her. I was not sure if I was trying to make up for the guilt I carried as a child when my mother had been brought down, and I was unable to help her. Or if it were possibly some obligation I felt toward the child, to see to it that her mother was taken care of, and spare her the guilt I had carried for years, despite the fact that my mother cared nothing for me. Whatever the reason, I was determined to remain close by her side until I was reassured of her well-being.

I dozed off at some point, only to startle awake as I felt a slight weight settle over me. I opened my eyes, and stared into the smiling face of the night duty sister.

"It's a bit chilly in here. I thought you might appreciate a blanket." She explained with a shrug when I looked down at the warm covering.

"I do." I smiled briefly. "Thank you." I looked over to the woman in the bed. "Any change?" I asked curiously.

"None. She is still resting comfortably, and tha'ts a good sign." She replied, adjusting a small clamp on one of the tubes.

"What are you doing?" I asked, surprised by the note of alarm in my tone.

"I needed to adjust the flow to her fluids." She explained quietly. "She wasn't getting quite the right dosage. She'll improve greatly now." As she turned to leave, she added, "Can I get you anything? Coffee? A sandwich? I noticed you didn't leave at all, and thought you might be hungry."

"ome coffee would be good. Where might I find that?" I asked, lifting the blanket aside, and dropping my feet to the floor.

"Oh no. Stay there." She hurried to stop me. "I'll bring it to you. How do you like it?"

"Black, thank you." I yawned, and settled back under the blanket after stretching my spine.

"I'll be right back." She hurried away, and I closed my eyes, falling deeply asleep before she returned.

* * *

Sometime later, I was startled awake by a sudden disturbance, and I threw the blanket aside, jumping to my feet, instantly in defence-mode. The woman in the bed, Rachel, was awake. She pointed her finger at me, and warned with a tremulous voice, "Don't come near me!"

I stilled immediately, and tried to explain, "I am Dev..."

"I don't care who you are!" She gave a frightened cry, looking frantically around the room. "Where's Dani? Where's my daughter? What have you done with my daughter?"

By then, the desk matron had heard the commotion, and hurried into the room. "I think you'd best wait outside, Mr. Robinson."

"Devon." I offered quickly.

"Devon." She acknowledged with a nod. "Let me explain for you, hmm?" She added, smiling reassuringly.

"You will let her know where Danielle is?" I murmured calmly.

"Yes, I'll fill her in, and calm her down." She replied. "I don't know if she will agree to let you back in here."

"I understand." I nodded, more anxious to reassure the woman than I was to gain entrance to her room. "If she has a message for Danielle, please pass it along to me. I will be sure she gets it." She nodded sharply, and turned her attention to the injured woman, and I slipped silently into the hall, and began to pace once more.

Every time I halted outside the door to peer through the glass, Rachel was staring right at me. I was unnerved by her steady gaze. She appeared to have calmed down a great deal, and was speaking quietly with the sister. I waited as they seemed to be concluding their conversation. Rachel stared at me for a moment, before turning her attention to the other woman, and nodding, darting another look in my direction.

I stepped back as the sister left the room. "Is she alright now?" I asked hesitantly.

"Actually, she is." She smiled. "She has agreed to let you come in for a few minutes, but I want her to rest! Don't stay too long!"

"I do not intend to, as there is a little girl waiting anxiously for news of her mother." I replied solemnly. "Thank you."

I entered the room, and stood near the foot of her bed. We eyed each other warily in silence. Her eyes were not the bright blue of her daughter's, I noted, but the blue green of the sea. I shook myself back to attention when she seemed to come to herself, and gestured to the chair I had vacated previously. "Please. Sit down." She invited, her voice subdued now that she was not frightened, and she tried to smile, but I could tell it was painful for her.

"I understand that I have you to thank for helping me." She murmured softly. "Thank you."

"You are quite welcome." I replied, not exactly comfortable with the situation.

"Dani is with your people?" She asked, her lip trembling. If she was going to begin to cry, I was going to be even more uncomfortable than I already was.

"I...yes." I answered succinctly. "They are not my people. I work for them. I happened to be the first of us to reach you, and bring you inside." She nodded, and looked at her hands.

"Would you help me to raise the head of this bed?" She asked softly. "I feel a little vulnerable lying here like this."

"Let me be sure that is allowed." I stammered, gesturing helplessly. "Your...injuries..." After clearing it with the matron, I fiddled with the buttons on the side of the bed, and managed to raise her sufficiently.

She struggled to adjust the pillows beneath her shoulders, and I automatically reached out to help her, pausing when she looked up in alarm, and flinched away in fear. "Let me...May I help?" I stammered, cursing myself for forgetting about the instinctive reaction, and not taking care with her. I waited for permission, before approaching her again.

I stepped away, and she smiled briefly. "Much better. Thank you...Devon, is it?"

"Yes". I lied, pushing down a sudden urge to reveal my true identity.

"I'm Rachel." She replied, holding out her hand. I took it briefly, and quickly dropped my arm to my side. "Is Dani safe?" She asked, her eyes clouding with worry.

"She is quite safe." I replied. "She is most anxious about you." I added awkwardly, my voice stilted as I struggled to carry on a normal conversation. "We made sure she was warm and dry. I gave her some ice cream."

"You've made a friend for life!" She laughed softly, and quickly put her hand over her ribs.

"Are you in pain?" I asked quickly. "Should I call the sister?"

"No, thank you, Devon." She smiled painfully. "I can deal with it just fine."

"But, if you can have some relief, you should take it." I urged gently. "It will help you to rest."

"I can't." She murmured softly, a soft blush tingeing her cheeks. "I might be expecting, and I don't want to take anything that might harm..." She stammered to a halt as she looked into my eyes. I did not know if I should say anything or not. It really was not my place, but my heart cracked upon hearing her confession. "You probably didn't want to hear that. I'm sorry." She gave an embarrassed laugh, and looked at her hands once again.

I needed to get out of there. It was becoming more painful by the minute to stand there, and watch her struggle. I felt as if a stifling cloud was pressing in on me from all sides, and I needed to escape. I cleared my throat, and announced, "I really should be getting back. It is late, and...is there anything you would like for me to tell Danielle?" I asked, my voice strained.

"Would you tell her that I love her, and that I told her not to worry, and that I'll see her soon?" She asked softly, and it occurred to me that it was the natural way of speaking for her.

"I will, yes." I replied solemnly. "Try not to worry about her. We will take good care of her for you."

"Thank you, Devon." She smiled again, and I nodded, and hurried from the room. I made my way down to the street, and around a corner, where I immediately apparated to the street in front of the house.

After talking with Alberta, and giving her the rundown on Rachel, she informed me that Danielle was in their room down the hall, trying desperately to be good for me. With a low growl of understanding, I nodded grimly, recalling the same desire as a child, and made my way to her room. I did not need to look behind me to see Alberta watching me. I could feel her eyes boring holes into my back all the way along the corridor.

I paused in the doorway, and studied the small form in the bed. Her eyes were closed, and I could tell that she had been crying. I drew a deep breath, and fought down the urge to growl in irritation. I was not equipped to be gentle in these matters, despite knowing, all too well, the intricacies of abuse.

I made my way to the chair beside the bed, and laid my hand upon her shoulder. "Danielle." I whispered, praying to the heavens that she was asleep, and that I could forego this conversation until the morning. I was feeling out of sorts after dealing with her mother, and I needed to retreat to the familiar safety of my solitary existence.

Her eyes flew open, and she threw herself into my arms. "Angel!" She cried in relief, and my spine stiffened, immediately rejecting her attempt to become familiar with me.

I peeled her off my chest, and she settled before me in the bed. "Did you see my Mommy?" She frowned anxiously.

"Yes, I did." I replied formally. "She will be fine in a few days, and she will come here."

"Will we be living with you?" She asked in her simple, childlike way.

I was swallowed by a sudden wave of irritation, and retorted harshly, "No. You will not be living with me."

Tears immediately filled her eyes, and her lip quivered threateningly. "Do we have to go back to live with Daddy?"

I closed my eyes, and drew a deep breath, searching for patience that had always been in very short supply. "No. You do not have to go back to your father, unless that is what your mother decides you must do. You may stay here in this house for as long as your mother wishes. I do not live here. I work here." I explained tightly, wishing I could escape.

"Are you mad at me because I didn't go to sleep, Devon?" She whispered tearfully. "I tried! But I couldn't because I miss my Mommy!"

I sighed heavily, and pinched the bridge of my nose. At the moment, I would rather take on insufferably incompetent students than this trembling, tearful, frightened child any day. "Danielle!" I snapped, and winced when she jumped in fear. "I told you that I would not be angry if you could not sleep." I explained, struggling to keep the edge off my tone.

"Then why do you have a mad face?" She asked in confusion.

"The proper word is angry, Danielle, not **_mad._ Only animals run mad, humans become angry." I explained irritably. "I am not angry, child. I am tired, very tired."**

"Then you should go to bed, Devon." She replied simply.

"I am trying to." I growled lowly, pointing to her pillow. "Lie down there." I ordered mildly, and pulled her blankets to her chin when she had settled. "Your Mum is sleeping. She asked me to reassure you that she will be alright, and to tell you not to worry about her. She will see you in a few more days."

"Okay, Devon." She smiled, snuggling her head into her pillow, and closing her eyes. I watched her in silence for several long moments. Just when I thought she had drifted off to sleep, her eyes popped open, and grew tearful. "Devon, I'm scared." She began to sob, and I suppressed a weary sigh. "I want my Mommy, Devon!" She softly cried, and her tears flowed even harder.

"Come here." I murmured softly, pulling the blankets away, and holding my arms out to her. I lifted her into my arms, and she cradled her head upon my shoulder as I began to pace the floor with her. I felt very uncomfortable in the beginning, but as we moved about the room, and her little body relaxed further toward sleep, I relaxed myself. I settled my chin upon her forehead, and began to put a gentle sway to my gait. I refuse to admit that I was dancing with the child. When her arm slipped around my shoulder, and she snuggled closer against my chest, I closed my eyes on the foreign feelings of warmth and acceptance that flooded my senses.

Unconsciously, at first, I began to hum a lullaby. It was a tune I had once heard Lily sing to her son. When I became aware of what I was doing, my voice stuck in my throat, and I swallowed it down, pacing silently for several minutes. Knowing I was alone, with only Danielle to hear, I hesitantly began to hum the tune again, and paced the room with her held securely to my chest. Not too much longer after that, I felt her relax into deep sleep, and settled her back into her bed.

"She also told me to tell you not to give me a difficult time." I threw in softly as I reached to turn off the bedside lamp. I sighed heavily once more, and turned to leave.

When I entered the hallway, I was startled when Alberta spoke from the shadows. "You already have a special connection to that child, Devon." She murmured thoughtfully. "I'd be careful if I were you. It's not wise to become attached."

Her words of caution rattled me, and I scowled as I passed her, suppressing the urge to childishly retort, "Who said I was becoming attached?", and made my way out the back door, knowing, deep in my heart, that she was right.


	4. Too Close For Comfort

Too Close For Comfort

I was awakened a few short hours later when a searing pain shot up my left arm. Albus had not ordered me to ignore any summons from the Dark Lord, nor had he ordered me to remain at my post in America. It was the first time all summer that I had been summoned, and I wondered what task would be put before me this time as I quickly donned my robes, and apparated away.

There was a full complement of Death Eaters assembled in the large meeting room when I arrived. Voldemort was not yet present, and a restless murmuring filled the room as we waited for him to appear.

A sudden whooshing sound filled the room, and moments later the Dark Lord stood in the centre of the room. I bowed, as did the rest of the Death Eaters standing there, and masked a derisive snort with a discrete cough when Lucius commented under his breath, "Show off."

As we were given permission to rise, Voldemort took his seat on an elaborate dais, replete with two golden snakes. They flanked an ornate, green velvet chair that boasted the Slytherin crest. The chair was rumoured to have belonged to Salazar Slytherin, and had once graced the high table at Hogwarts.

Voldemort looked out over the gathered minions before him, and drew a deep breath. "Another school year is about to begin at Hogwarts. It is time for us to put our plans in motion in preparation for the Potter brat's return to the school." He rose, and stepped down, gliding effortlessly amongst us, stopping to look at us through glowing maniacal eyes as he saw fit.

I groaned inwardly when the lunatic settled his evil gaze upon me, and braced myself for impact. But he simply stared at me in contemplative silence, before he moved on to the next person, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"I have come up with such a plan." He announced arrogantly, stepping back upon the platform in a swirl of robes. "I think that, for starters, our first task will be to eliminate Albus Dumbledore. The brat won't know his arse from his ear without that meddling old fool showing him which direction to take!"

"My Lord!" Lucius blurted excitedly, startling me from my musings. "Which of us shall be given the honour of performing such a task?"

"Kiss arse." I muttered sardonically so that only he would hear, and he glared at me as we turned our attention back to Voldemort.

I could tell, immediately, that the interruption had angered the mad man. I waited expectantly as Voldemort whirled around to face the recklessly eager blond. "I believe that your son, Draco, shall be given this order." Voldemort sneered. "See that he does not fail, Lucius, or he will take the old fool's place."

"My Lord..." Lucius stammered in alarm, his face paling considerably.

"Silence!" Voldemort snapped angrily. "You wished for honour upon your name, Lucius. See that your son delivers." He turned in another dramatic swirl of robes, and returned to his throne, his order given, and expected to be followed. I felt my heart sink. I knew that Draco would be no match for Albus, and even if he were brave enough to face him down, he would not win. Albus would not kill the boy, of course, but Voldemort would when Draco failed to do as ordered. I would need to pass this news along to Albus as quickly as possible so that a back up plan could be implemented in order to save them both.

My attention was brought sharply back into focus with Voldemort's next words. "I've been hearing reports that one of you has left England, and has failed to inform me of this." He looked directly at me, and I stiffened, preparing myself for the fallout. "Severus, I hear that you have been spending your summer holiday in the United States. Did you not think that this news was of importance to me?" He snarled angrily, and I swallowed convulsively, knowing I was not going to escape this meeting unscathed.

"Forgive me, My Lord. I admit I have been remiss in my duty." I murmured lowly, and bowed before him, despite knowing the respect I afforded him would do no good should he decide to punish me.

"So, you felt that you had every right to simply disappear, without a word to anyone?" Voldemort questioned silkily, and dread filled my heart. I was going to be quite damaged by the time he was finished.

My brain scrambled, weighing my options, trying to determine which story to give that would garner the least harmful punishment. I quickly decided to make it appear as if I had done as he suggested. It was what he was already expecting anyway, and might possibly offer him that slight satisfaction, and his retaliation might also be less severe because of it.

"I fear you are right, My Lord." I bowed once more. "I have had no word from you in quite some time, and the school year has ended. I thought it might be the perfect opportunity for a small vacation. I apologize for not informing you of my whereabouts in advance."

In the end, it did not matter. I was dealt a harsh reminder of my place. His explanation was that someone in my position within his ranks, not only should know his place without question, but had to serve as an example for the others should they fail as well. Barely able to stand by the time I was dismissed, I apparated to the gates outside of Hogwarts, and reported to the Headmaster.

"Severus!" Albus cried in alarm, jumping to his feet, and rushing to assist me, as I entered his tower rooms, looking as beaten as I felt. "Come. Sit here. Do you need Poppy, my boy?" He questioned, his frown of worry increasing the amount of furrows lining his face as he took my arm, and led me to a chair.

"I will be fine." I grunted dismissively as I settled in the chair before his desk. "I have urgent news, Headmaster."

He sighed wearily in resignation, and returned to his chair. "Tell me your news." He ordered, knowing I would not budge until I had given my report.

"This time he has targeted you, Sir." I replied bluntly.

He nodded solemnly, before commenting, "We assumed he would eventually, Severus."

"There is more." I stated, wincing as a sharp pain lanced through my midsection. His gaze shifted to where my hand held my ribs, but he did not comment further on my injuries. "He has ordered that Draco be the one todo the deed."

Albus immediately looked alarmed. "He has ordered a child to go up against a fully-powered wizard? There is no logic in that! Why did he do it?"

"He was using it as a punishment for Lucius' arrogance." I retorted, worried for the boy's life. Despite being spoiled rotten by Lucius, Draco had a special place in my heart. The boy was an innocent, despite his desire to please his father by any means that were required. The urge to protect him was a strong one, and I was determined to see that he was safe.

"Well, there is a twisted logic to that, I suppose." Albus sighed in disappointment. "We can't allow it to happen, Severus. You're going to have to do it in his place."

"What?" I exclaimed, jumping to my feet, and immediately regretting it. "Albus, I can not do that! You can not be serious!"

"Severus, you know as well as I do, that the boy won't succeed in this. It has to be done, child." He murmured gently. "It's going to be up to you to save that boy's soul. He still has a chance at this point to make the right choices."

"And what of my soul, Albus?" I whispered harshly, then shook my head, angrily dismissing the question. "I do not want to do this."

"I know you don't, my son." He replied softly. "But, you are the only one I would trust with the task."

"I do not want to do this!" I growled angrily, gritting my teeth. "There has to be another way! I will find it! I swear to you."

"Severus, even if you do find a way, it will be a waste of time." He insisted gently. "I'm already dying, child." He held up his hand, and showed me the blackened appendage. "I thoughtlessly destroyed this." He reported, sliding a sheet of parchment across his desk that had a ring resting upon it. I reached for it, and he cried in alarm, "Don't touch it!"

"What is it?" I asked, looking to him for answers.

"It is as we suspected, Severus." He replied sadly. "A horcrux."

I drew a deep breath through my nose. "Is there nothing that can be done?" I whispered gravely. "A potion I can prepare? A spell I can perform to stop it? To at least slow it down?"

"No, my child." He replied gently. "It is the end for me, no matter which way it comes. But, I actually would prefer you to do this, rather than suffer the painful, slow death of this curse. Please, Severus."

I sat in stunned silence. "I can try to find a way, Headmaster." I proffered hopefully. "Let me look for a cure."

"No, child." He shook his head, and my heart shattered. "I have lived for a very long time. I've had a full, and, for the most part, happy life. I am ready for this."

Tears filled my eyes, and I swallowed hard. "I do not want to do this." I whispered hoarsely one last time. "But, I will, because you have asked me to. I will keep Draco safe, as I will Potter."

"I know you will, Severus. You're a good man." He nodded, and closed his eyes for a moment. "Thank you."

He urged me to see Poppy, but I refused, stating that I merely needed rest, and that I would be fine. I apparated to my home at Spinner's End, only to find Peter Pettigrew waiting there for me. He had been sent to assist me should I need it after my encounter with Voldemort. Before I could escape his presence, there was a knock on my door, and I answered to see Narcissa Malfoy, and her delusional sister, Bellatrix LeStrange, standing on my front stoop.

By the time they left me alone, I not only had the weight of Albus' demise hanging over my head, but the weight of an Unbreakable Vow with Narcissa to save her son, shrouding me as well. I felt trapped, and a heavy sense of dread lingered long after I was alone.

Some foreign obligation I felt toward Alberta forced me to return to the Lighthouse, and my temporary home there. I was exhausted from the stress of this turn of events, and the punishment I had received from my master. I wearily stumbled into my bedroom, and fell onto my bed, groaning in pain. I reached for a bottle of dreamless sleep, and downed it in one gulp, succumbing to its effects in an instant.

A loud knocking slowly registered in my brain at about the same time as a woman's voice, calling to me, reached my ears. "Devon? Are you there?" It was Cassie, and I rolled out of bed with a low groan as every nerve ending, and muscle, protested my movement. "Devon? It's almost noon...are you there?"

I opened the door a few minutes later, and stared at her, still struggling to shake off the stupor caused by my drugged sleep. "I am here." I stated dumbly, and she gasped when she saw me.

"Oh my goodness!" She exclaimed in shock. "Are you ill?"

"No, I am not." I groaned, and flinched away from the sun's glare.

"Devon!" She exclaimed in a hushed tone, leaning closer to me, and peering at me as she sniffed suspiciously. "Are you drunk? Hung over?"

That comment quickly set me to rights. "No, I am not drunk, nor am I hung over!" I snarled angrily. "I had trouble sleeping last night, and took something for it. I simply overslept! I will make my way to the house in a few moments. Thank you for waking me." I slammed the door in her face, and made my way to the shower.

I let the hot, steaming water beat down on my aching muscles until the water ran cold. By the time I was dressed and ready for my day, only my ribs showed any sign of my punishment the night before. I suspected that a few might be cracked after the ordeal.

* * *

When I entered at the back door of the house a short time later, Cassie and Alberta were there, heads bent close together, whispering. They looked up, guiltily, when I entered, and Cassie quickly left the room, casting a wary look in my direction. I glared at her as she walked past, before turning my gaze toward Alberta.

"Good afternoon." I mumbled irritably as Alberta eyed me critically. "I will finish up in the green room today, and start on clearing the attic before I end my day." I informed her as I poured myself a quick cup of coffee.

"Devon. Sit down." Alberta ordered calmly, pulling out a chair, and taking her seat. I sat in the chair she proffered, and waited for her to state what was on her mind. She drew a deep breath, and let it out, her gaze out of focus as she sorted her thoughts. "First of all, I'm not going to say anything about the fact that you took the morning off."

"I did not..." I stammered defensively.

"Let me finish." She ordered sharply, and flashed a mild glare in my direction. "I have no objection to you starting late today. Your work is exemplary, and you have been working hard since you came here. I've felt you needed a break for quite some time now."

"Thank you." I muttered, unsure as to what else I could say without revealing too much of the truth.

"But, the reason I wanted to speak with you was because of all that went on around here yesterday." She paused, and flashed a concerned look in my direction. "I want to know if you were avoiding coming in here today because of the incident with Dani last night."

"No, Alberta." I replied sharply. "I was not avoiding anything. I had trouble sleeping last night, true enough, and took something for it. I simply overslept."

"I feel as if these women affect you in a personal way." She ventured hesitantly, and I bristled warily. "Devon." She paused for a moment, her gaze shifting away before she looked to me again. "Were you and your mother abused? I get the feeling that you are keeping something from me, but I want you to know that I can be trusted, should you need to talk."

"I do not need to talk." I replied stonily, and her frown of concern deepened considerably.

"Your reaction to my question is very telling, and apparently your answer would be a resounding, Yes., I see." She nodded simply, and drew a deep breath. "Your actions explain a lot. I won't question you further on it." She replied straightforwardly, in complete understanding, as she came to her feet.

"Devon!" An excited shout hit my ears as the kitchen door slammed open, and Dani raced into the room. "Where have you been all day? I've missed you!" She threw herself into my side, and I tried to brace myself for the impact, but failed. I grunted painfully, and pushed her to arm's length. Alberta's gaze sharpened immediately as she gave me another critical once over. I groaned inwardly, she could tell I was injured. Damn.

"Dani, Devon and I are talking business, dear. Run along and play, and when we are done, if Devon has time, he will talk to you then. Alright?" Alberta informed the child gently.

"Alright, Al." She agreed brightly, and gave me a tight hug. I winced, and nodded when she called after her, "Bye, Devon! See ya later!"

"What did you do to yourself, Devon?" Alberta turned on me as soon as we were alone.

"Nothing." I replied, staring back at her with a neutral expression.

"You, Mr. Robinson, are in pain, and a liar." She retorted, her lips pressed together firmly. "What happened?"

"I told you. Nothing." I insisted, maintaining the indifferent expression despite the fact that I was now pretty certain that I had received a cracked rib or two on my latest adventure. "I rolled out of bed the wrong way when Cassie startled me awake, and I may have put a rib out of place. It will right itself in a day or two." I reported dismissively.

"Then you are released from doing any more around here until such time." She announced, and I opened my mouth to protest. "No arguments, Devon, not one thing until you are put to rights! Is that understood?"

I drew an annoyed breath, and grumbled softly, "Yes, madam." I wondered which person was worse to deal with, Voldemort, Alberta or Albus, as I made my way back to my home.

My recovery actually took me three days, and I spent that time working in the small herb garden I had cultivated since I had arrived. I had managed to plant a few of the more questionable plants that I needed for brewing simple potions without raising any suspicions. I was lucky in that none of these people were aware of the things I was capable of creating from these unfamiliar plants.

Early on the third morning of my recovery, I was there, gathering fresh belladonna while the dew was still on the petals, when a soft voice spoke from behind me, "Excuse me?" I startled, looking over my shoulder to see Rachel standing there at the edge of the garden.

"You're Devon, right?" She enquired softly, giving me a tentative smile.

I slowly came to my feet, and removed my gloves. "Yes." I replied, eyeing her guardedly. She was showing signs of healing. The bruises on her face were turning colour, indicating that they were fading. I took note that she was about 134 cm, quite petite, and would just fit beneath my chin if we were to...My thought came to an abrupt halt as I realized where my mind had travelled, and I cleared my throat, shifting uneasily.

"I was released late yesterday." She stammered haltingly, her voice stilted, and unsure. "I wanted to thank you for all you've done for us." She drew a hitching breath, and I simply waited to hear what she was going to say. I could not trust my voice in that moment, had I even dared to try. "I hope Dani hasn't been a problem for you. She can be..."

"Danielle has not been a problem." I cut in quickly, reassuring her, and she swallowed, nodding sharply.

Her gaze swept over the garden, and she stepped into the row beside me. "I recognize the chives, parsley, oregano, and dill, but what is this pretty yellow one?" She asked, pointing right at a healthy belladonna.

I cleared my throat in agitation once more, debating how to answer. "That is belladonna." I decided to reply truthfully, forcing myself not to step away from her, because she was suddenly too near, near enough for me to notice the way she smelled.

"Isn't it toxic?" She frowned worriedly, surprising me with her knowledge.

"It can be." I admitted, feeling a sudden, inexplicable kinship with the soft-spoken woman, and it made me uncomfortable when I considered all we had in common already. "However, it can serve a useful purpose in some of the concoctions I create."

"You're an herbalist." She stated confidently, smiling up at me with those deep, sea green eyes.

"Chemistry Professor." I clarified sedately, giving myself a mental shake. "I do this on the side as a hobby." I shrugged, gesturing toward the plants.

"Ah." She looked around once more. "Well, I won't keep you. I just wanted to thank you, and make sure that Dani wasn't being a pest. She never stopped talking about you last night, and I..."

"Rachel." I called quietly, stopping her again. "She was not any trouble. At all." She nodded, turning away, and I watched her cross the lawn. She reached the corner of the house, and turned to me with a slight wave, and a tentative smile. I was slightly unnerved, but returned the wave before turning back to my garden.

The next morning, when I emerged from my home, I was surprised to see Rachel, dressed in jeans, and a faded shirt, on her knees, tending my garden. I came to a halt near her, and she looked up with a warm smile. "Good morning, Devon." It surprised me to realize that she was actually pleased to see me. It was something I was not used to in the least. Even those I considered friends, never really looked as if they were happy to be near me.

"Good morning." I murmured, eyeing the progress she had made, before giving her my attention again.

"I hope you don't mind?" She questioned anxiously. "I could see that you weren't moving very freely yesterday, and Alberta told me you had hurt yourself. So, I thought you might need a little help here." She explained nervously when I did not comment. "I think I know what's here well enough that I haven't damaged anything important'."

I shook myself to attention when she faltered, and drew a deep breath. "It appears to be fine. Thank you for the help. "I murmured uncomfortably. "I have to get back to my work. I have missed too much time..." I stammered to a halt when it occurred to me that I was practically babbling. "Mind yourself around the belladonna. Wash thoroughly when you have finished." I instructed briefly, and walked away. I could feel her eyes upon me as I made my way to the house.

Alberta had received a grant from the state, and intended to remodel the upper floors into four new guest quarters. I planned to get a start on gutting the area down to the rafters before I would return to my classes and Hogwarts. I shoved a foreign feeling of discomfort over that aside, and rolled up my sleeves. For some odd reason, I did not want to go home. Knowing what the coming year held in store for my world if I could not come up with a way to avoid it, served as the most logical reason for my negative feelings.

* * *

A few days later, I was in the attic, busily tossing debris from the demolition out the window in irritation. If I were able to use magic, the entire job would have been completed within moments, rather than taking me days. I was grumbling to myself in silence, generally disgusted over the way I had to reign in my power, and live in this manner, when Danielle burst into the room. "Devon! She called loudly, shocking me with the sudden outburst. "Hi!"

"Danielle." I glared, my heart still racing from being startled out of my musings.

"Did I scare you?" She frowned anxiously, coming to a halt halfway across the space.

"You did not frighten me, child." I growled. "You _startled_ me. I will have you know that very little frightens me."

"How come you talk like that, Devon?" She tilted her head in curiosity.

"I do not know what you mean, Danielle." I sighed in irritation. I was becoming tired of her making a fuss over my manner of speech.

"Well, you don't say things the same way as me." She frowned, her eyes going out of focus as she thought about it. "When you talk, I sometimes can't make out what you're saying because your voice is...tilted sideways."

"Indeed." I commented, turning to face her for a moment, before picking up another armload of debris.

"Yeah. Like that word right there...it's weird. Nobody else says it, and then the sound of your words isn't like mine or Mommy's or anybody else's, either."

I suddenly realized what she was referring to, and I shook my head. "Danielle, I am British. I have an accent that is specific to that area of the world. It is just the same as the sound of your voice, child. You are from Michigan, so you sound as you do when you speak, and it sounds strange to me."

"Oh!" She exclaimed, suddenly understanding. "So, that means the lady on the tv is Br..Bri..." She struggled for a moment, and I interceded. "British, Danielle. She is British, as am I."

"Danielle, are you being a pest?" Rachel spoke from the top of the stairs, smiling apologetically in my direction. "I told you not to be bothering Devon when hes working."

"I know, Mommy, but I wanted to say hi to him!" Danielle protested in a whiney voice, and my spine stiffened in irritation.

"Danielle, do not argue with your mother, and do not whine." I snapped, and both females looked at me, their eyes widening in shock. "Pardon me." I murmured, clearing my throat, and turning back to my work. It really was none of my business or concern if Rachel decided to allow the child to behave in such a manner.

"I will keep her out of your hair." Rachel murmured softly, taking Danielle by the hand. "Danielle, how many times do I have to tell you not to pester people! I will remind you once more, not to bother Devon when he is working." She looked at me in silence for a moment, her eyes hardening as she spoke. "I'm sorry for the intrusion, Mr. Robinson. Enjoy your day."

I nodded, and watched them descend out of sight, knowing that she was angry with me over my unwelcome orders. "Why is he so mad all the time, Mommy?" I overheard Danielle question as they moved out of hearing range, and I could not hear what her mother told her. I drew a deep breath, and went back to work.

When I had the room cleared out, and ready to be put back together, I decided that it was enough for one day, and made my way downstairs to the kitchen. Alberta was busily preparing vegetables for dinner, and Rachel was working closely by her side. They were talking quietly, and looked up as I entered the room.

"Good afternoon." I nodded as I made my way toward the back door.

"Devon." Alberta called after me. "We're having a small celebratory dinner this evening. Would you care to join us?"

I looked at her strangely. I joined them every evening for dinner, and wondered what she was playing at. I narrowed my eyes at her, and she cast a guarded look in my direction. "What are we celebrating?" I asked, stepping into the room, carefully assessing each woman.

"Rachel has filed for divorce, and we are going to celebrate her bravery. Alberta smiled, linking her arm through the younger woman's. "We wondered if you'd like to join in with us?"

I slid my gaze in Rachel's direction, and she smiled shyly, unable to hold eye contact. I was not surprised over that, but I was surprised to see the faint pink blush come to her cheeks. Apparently, she was no longer angry with me over disciplining her child. I returned my focus to Alberta, and she smiled benignly. "I would be honoured to help you celebrate this victory. I will return after I have taken a few moments to clean up." I bowed, and continued on my way.

We had adjourned to the front parlour after dinner for tea and cake. After a while, I began to feel as if I were out of place with being the only man in the room. I rose, and gathered plates and cups, carrying them to the kitchen. I ran water in the sink, and began to clean up for the evening. I was lost in my thoughts when movement out of the corner of my eye, caught my attention. Rachel had reached for a towel, and began to dry the dishes, and put them away.

I smiled briefly in appreciation, and she returned it, adding, "I thought you could use some help. When you didn't return right away, I assumed that this was what you were doing."

"Thank you." I replied, turning back to the sink full of dishes. We worked in companionable silence for a few minutes, until she spoke again.

"I...um...I want to apologize for my rudeness this morning." She murmured softly. "I was surprised by your intervention, and reacted badly."

I looked up sharply, considering her choice of words...intervention. "I do not understand." I murmured cautiously. "You were angry over my intrusion, and now you are apologizing for it. You had every right to be angry with me, Rachel. It was not my business to intrude. You owe me no apology. As for my intervention..." I paused, carefully considering my words, because if I were to venture into this subject, it might become more involved than I cared to be in the matter. I drew a deep breath, and let it out slowly, rinsing the last of the suds from the sink.

"I am a professor in a boarding school in Scotland." I began to explain, taking the towel she offered, and drying my hands. "As such, we are required to be parental on occasion. My actions were borne out of habit. Were I to have a student behave in the manner Danielle had this morning, showing a lack of respect for her elders, I would be required to step in, and correct the behaviour. If there is an apology owed here, it is mine. I apologize for stepping in before you had the chance to discipline your own child."

I handed the towel over to her, and she looked at it for a few moments in silence, before slapping it down on the counter. She looked sharply at me, and nodded. "I accept your apology, but I want you to know that I probably wouldn't have done anything like you did."

"I am sorry if my methods were too harsh." I spoke up quickly.

"Let me finish." She replied softly. "I probably would have ignored her, and walked away, or I would have gone into a battle of wills with her, backing down, and allowing her to get away with it as well."

"Why would you have let her get away with it?" I questioned curiously, holding up the carafe of coffee in silent inquiry.

She nodded, accepting my offer of a cup. "I don't know." She replied with a shrug, as I poured. She moved away from me, taking her cup to the table. I followed, sitting across from her, watching in silence as she prepared her drink. I tried not to cringe when she added not only a healthy dollop of cream, but a heaping spoonful of sugar as well.

"I am no expert, by any means." I declared calmly. "I do not even have any children. It just seems to me that children should mind their betters."

"Their betters?" She whispered hauntingly, and I cursed my carelessness as I saw the dawning knowledge in her eyes. "Devon...I'm..." She jumped to her feet, and hurried out the back door, and I followed closely behind her.

"Rachel!" I called with a desperate whisper. "Where are you going?" She hurried around to the front of the house, and I grabbed her arm as I quickly caught up with her. "Wait!"

"I need to be alone, Devon. Please, let me go." She commanded in her soft tone.

She turned to walk away once more, and I whispered softly, "You are right, you know." She stopped in her tracks, and slowly turned to look at me in curiosity. "What you are thinking...it is true. I was often told by my father that I needed to mind my betters." I did not understand this compulsion I had when it came to this woman. Everything in me forced me to admit only the truth to her, and despite the danger that presented both to myself, and to her, I could not bring myself to lie.

I stood there, my heart pounding in anticipation. Of what, exactly, I could not be sure. She slowly returned to stand before me, and I gazed at her in silence. When she reached out, and touched my face, I flinched in reaction. A reaction borne of years of abuse; a conditioned response to my years of suffering.

"I-I'm sorry." She stammered, snatching her hand away. I grabbed her wrist, but simply released her as the moment grew even more awkward between us. I think she could sense my confusion and inner turmoil, and knew I needed space. She slowly climbed the steps, and I expected her to enter the house, and leave me to sort myself alone. But she didn't. She settled into the porch swing, and slowly began to rock, not even looking in my direction.

After several long moments of silent debate, during which time, Lily's voice came softly in my mind, "Don't be afraid to trust her, Severus. You trusted me once upon a time, it is time to trust again." Deciding that Rachel had already figured out my dirty little secret, and that there was no point in denying the truth, I drew a deep breath, slowly crossed the yard, and climbed the stairs. I came to a halt before her, and waited for her to acknowledge me. When she looked up, I gestured toward the swing, and murmured, "May I sit?"

"Of course." She smiled, and moved over, allowing me to settle beside her.

The silence stretched between us once again, and she was the first to break it. I was surprised when she did not even mention what had transpired between us. Instead, she spoke of her situation, showing an amazing amount of trust in me.

"I'm frightened about my husband's reaction to my filing for divorce, Devon." She looked up, and there were tears in her eyes. "Eddie gets so violent, so quickly, and it can be over the simplest of things. I'm afraid of how he will react to this."

"I am familiar with your situation." I replied, my voice faltering. "My...father...was very much the same. Does your husband also drink?" I swallowed, not sure if it was because I was taking such a huge chance in trusting her, or if it was because I already suspected what her answer would be.

"Oh yes, and it's ten times worse when he is." She whispered, drawing a deep breath. I nodded in complete agreement, memories from the past flooding my mind.

"You will be safe here." I murmured reassuringly. "Alberta will see that you are protected."

"I can't stay here forever, Devon." She whispered softly. "Eventually, I'm going to have to go back to my home. Dani will have to go back to school. I'll have to find work...and I know Eddie isn't going to ever leave us alone!"

In spite of myself, I reached out, and enclosed her hand in mine, holding tightly to it for a brief moment. "It will be alright. You are doing the right thing."

"I know I am, but knowing it doesn't make it any less frightening." She murmured softly. "But I can no longer live with him. I will not live with a murderer!"

"What?" I exclaimed in shock. "Murderer? You must turn him over to the authorities!"

"I didn't have to." She sobbed suddenly, and I startled upon hearing the sharp sound. "Dr. Foster did it for me."

"Doctor..." I stammered, and closed my eyes. 'Damn. She knew.' I thought sadly. "I am sorry, Rachel."

She looked up at me in surprise. "You knew?" She whispered, wiping her eyes, quickly under control of her emotions.

"Yes." I replied carefully, looking down at my hands.

"Why didn't you say anything?" She questioned, her voice strained.

"It was not my place." I answered bluntly.

"I see." She replied coldly, and I could tell she was angry with me. I had no clue as to why she felt it was my place to give her such news, but I was compelled to defend myself to her anyway.

"Rachel, when I came to hospital with you, I waited around for them to give me a report on your condition, so that I could come back here, and reassure Danielle." I swallowed, and took a deep breath. "I spoke with Doctor Foster, and he informed me of the child, but he did not know if you were aware of..." I grimaced in annoyance. No matter which way I tried to explain, it would hurt her, and I hated the fact. "By not knowing whether you were aware of the child yet, I felt it best that I not say anything on the matter."

"But Devon, I told you of my suspicions that night." She argued quietly. "You stood right there, knowing that I had lost my baby, and didn't say a thing!"

Her words angered me, and I glared at her. "If you recall, you were not very receptive to having a stranger in your room. Was I to know that you would expect me to tell you that your unborn child was dead?" I regretted it as soon as the words were out of my mouth, too late to bite them off and swallow them. "I am sorry." I apologized softly when I saw the blood drain from her face. "Forgive me. That was completely unnecessary." She looked at her hands, and did not reply. The silence stretched an eternity between us, and I slowly came to my feet. "I am sorry for my harsh words, and sorry for your loss, Rachel. I will leave you to your thoughts. Goodnight."

I had made it down the first step before she called to me. "Devon. Stop. Come back, please. You're right. It wasn't your place to give me such news, and I'm sorry I lashed out at you. Please come back, and talk with me for a while."

I slowly crossed over to her, eyeing her warily. She smiled encouragingly, and I settled beside her, unable to fully relax. She drew a deep breath, and continued to tell me about her husband's arrest. "Dr. Foster reported the situation to the police. There's a growing awareness in the general public about such things happening. Men learning of unwanted children, who resort to beating their women in the hopes of killing the child. They're coming down hard on people who are suspected of trying it. Eddie succeeded, but he was caught. He was arrested the day after you brought me to the hospital. He was arraigned, and bail was set extraordinarily high. He couldn't raise the amount, and he's sitting in jail, awaiting trial, and growing angrier, and angrier, the longer he's there."

My mind drifted to the past, and the vicious words my father would hurl at me during fits of rage, about how he had tried to eliminate me before I was born. Just as I became aware of the silence that had stretched between us, she laid her hand on my arm, startling me, despite the fact that I had already journeyed back to the present. "Where were your thoughts just now, Devon?" She asked gently. I drew a deep breath, and let it out, my spine stiffening automatically in defence. "Please, tell me." She whispered softly. "I can tell you don't want to, but I think I understand. Wont you trust me, just a little bit, Devon?"

I looked into her eyes, a'nd saw nothing but understanding, and concern. Lily's voice whispered softly, "Trust her, Severus." I passed a hand over my face, and drew a deep breath. After a few false starts, she whispered again, "Take your time, Devon. I know it isn't easy to discuss."

Some more time passed as I struggled over how to begin. She carefully reached out, and placed her hand on mine, smiling gently. "I know how difficult it is to truly give your trust to anyone, but you can trust me, Devon."

The smile on her face encouraged me to trust her, but a festering, deep-seated, hatred boiled up from deep inside. All I could see was the way my father used to smile at me. I remembered how he would gain my trust, just long enough to break it as he beat me senseless. "Why would I trust you?" I snarled, jumping to my feet as anger swelled in my chest. "I do not even know you!" I glared at her over my shoulder as I stormed off the porch, and fled to my home.

I laid there for hours in the dark, my mind turning over and over every moment that had passed since Danielle and Rachel had come into my life. As I recalled what had just happened, and my subsequent reaction to it, my thoughts turned to Danielle. Dread filled my mind when I considered a future for her that was much like mine due to the abuses she had already suffered in her young life.

As I lie there, images of the child filled my head. She had worked her way into my heart before I knew what was happening to me. Something that no child had ever managed to do, not even Lily's son, not that he had tried. I supposed that was my doing as well. I hadn't given the boy a chance. All I could see when I looked at him was his father, and my hatred for him swelled. When I looked into his eyes, all I saw was Lily, and my heart shattered every time over the loss of the only true friend I had ever had while growing up.

I reflected on moments spent with Danielle, such as the day I was working in the flower beds alongside the house, when she ran up to me, excited over an ice cream vendor, peddling his way up the street. "Devon, look, the ice cream truck! Can I have a popsicle? Please Devon, please!" She had begged. Despite my immediate urge to correct her improper speech, I reached in my pocket to hand her the money for her ice cream. "You owe me for that, child." I had murmured wryly, and she quickly agreed, throwing her arms around my waist before I could fend her off, so happy over the treat that she was willing to agree to anything.

"Thank you, Devon!" She had exclaimed as she released me, frowning suddenly. "Daddy never lets me have anything from the ice cream man." She had raced to the front walk to wait, turning to flash an impish grin in my direction. I had returned the smile, in spite of myself.

I swung my legs out of bed, and sat there, my mind still turning. I rubbed my face, and another moment floated into my mind. I had been working in one of the bedrooms, finishing up the trim, and passed through the kitchen on my way out the back door. Danielle was seated at the table, watching Alberta remove a pan of freshly baked biscuits to a rack.

"Devon! Come see what I made!" She called as soon as she spotted me. "I helped Alberta make cookies. This one is you." She declared proudly, holding the misshapen confection out for my inspection. In all honesty, I must admit that it had a smile made from red icing on it. I supposed to her, that qualified as looking like me, although I questioned the presence of a smile.

Banishing the memories with a shake of my head, I made my way into the loo to splash water on my face. The image of her happy little face, beaming up at me whenever she saw me, refused to be washed away. I had never had a child like me that I could call to mind, and I was unnerved. "Time to go, Severus." I growled at my image in the mirror. I was becoming too involved, getting too close to them, attached. I sighed heavily, and knew what I needed to do. I had to leave, and I had to go immediately, despite not completely finishing what Id agreed to do for Alberta before I returned to school.

I settled once more on my bed, and pulled on my boots. With another heavy sigh, my decision made, I retrieved my wand, and apparated to the attic. I took an assessing look around the space, and with a quick wave of my wand, the room was prepared for the renovations that were planned. I silently moved through the rest of the house, undetected by the sleeping occupants, performing any minor repairs that were still needed. The changes were subtle enough that, were they to be noticed at all, it would be simply passed off to not noticing many of the tasks I had completed while I stayed here.

I returned to my temporary home, and stood in the middle of the great room, looking all around me. I was surprised to realize that I would miss it here, and my resolve hardened. It was definitely time for me to go home to my own life. I had no place here in this world. I set to work, making sure anything that would remind anyone I had been there was removed, and then stopped abruptly. With another wave of my wand, I returned everything as it was, and I shook my head. Feeling more uncertain, than sure, of my decision, I lowered myself into my chair, and stared out the window until the sun rose brightly in the morning sky.

"Good morning, Devon." Alberta greeted me with a smile that quickly faded as soon as she took a closer look at my face. "What's on your mind this morning?" She murmured gently. "I can see you haven't slept a wink."

"It is time for me to go home, Alberta." I replied simply. "I will be leaving today, this morning, in fact."

"I thought you were staying for another week!" She exclaimed in surprise.

"There is no need." I replied rather sharply, and her eyes narrowed. "I have completed the work that I promised I would do. It is time for me to go back to Scotland, and prepare for classes." I added, tempering my tone.

She set her coffee cup down on the counter, and wrapped her arms around me, hugging me tightly. "Devon, I can't thank you enough for all you've done for this place over the summer. You've been a blessing, and an angel. I'm going to really miss you being around here."

I stiffened in response, unable to return the embrace. "I have done what I could, but I am no angel, Alberta. I told you that once before." I murmured, wishing that I was able to return her affection in a physical manner. My words would have to be enough. "I have grown to admire you a great deal, Alberta, and I am surprised to find that I will miss you very much, too."

She stepped away, and we shared a look that was full of knowledge, and an understanding that I knew we would never discuss. It would have to be enough. She nodded, briefly, and replied, "I will miss your quiet presence, Devon. Let me tell Rachel that you're going. I'm sure she will want to say goodbye."

"There is no need." I cut in sharply, and swallowed anxiously. "We said all we needed to say to each other last night." I continued more calmly, hoping she might accept my explanation.

"What about Danielle?" She questioned softly. "You should tell her goodbye. She'll be crushed if you don't."

I drew a deep breath, and bowed my head. "I think it is best if I do not speak to her. I think it best if I make a clean break. She has become too attached to me, and I can not stay any longer. I refuse to put her through it. I must go. Now."

The familiar sensation of her blue eyes boring holes into my back, followed me all the way to the street. I paused there, fighting the urge to look back at the house as I waited for the cab to pull to the curb. I climbed into the back, and closed my eyes, wishing for a way to shut out the sound of her voice as Danielle burst through the door. "Devon! Come back!" I cursed the open windows as she raced down the sidewalk, calling for me, and sobbing brokenly, "Angel! Come back! Please, come back! I love you, Devon! I love you! Please come back..."

"Pull over to the curb." I ordered a few blocks later.

"Change your mind, buddy?" He grinned into the mirror at me.

"No." I replied coldly. "I no longer require your services." Tossing a generous amount of Muggle money at him through the open window, I stalked away until I was no longer visible. I ducked into a deserted alleyway, and apparated to my home on Spinner's End, Danielle's cries still echoing in my ears.


	5. The World Behind My Wall

****

Ch 4 ~ The World Behind My Wall

The house was quiet, too quiet, when I apparated into the hallway of my home. It was quite different from the constant hum of activity in the shelter. There was no laughter, or excited shouts to be heard, nor was there the tears or angry outbursts from enraged humanity. No, here there was only the oppressive silence of my solitary existence, and Danielle's tearful cries echoing in my mind. I sighed heavily, and took in my surroundings...home.

I started a fire in the grate to ward off the damp chill, then went to the tiny kitchen at the back of the house, and checked my supplies. I had a tin of tea, and found a jar of strawberry jam that could be spread on a piece of toast. As I searched through the cabinets, I suddenly recalled that strawberry jam had been one of Danielle's favourites. I gritted my teeth against the sudden constriction in my chest, and clenched my fists.

"Damn it to Hell!" I roared as I stalked from the kitchen without a backward glance, and made my way up the hall. The fire had begun warming the sitting room, and I settled into my chair. I closed my eyes for a moment, forcing all thoughts of Rachel and Danielle to the deepest recesses of my mind, where they would stay until such time as they were removed completely.

With supreme effort, I schooled my mind to thoughts of the approaching term. Soon, I was immersed in the routine of creating a syllabus for each class year that would suit their skill levels. Advanced Potions was going to be a challenge, and as near to being a joy to teach as I would allow. The work occupied my mind sufficiently enough to keep thoughts of 'them' at bay.

That night, sleep evaded me, and therefore, I was almost happy to feel the burn begin in my left arm. I apparated to the chosen meeting place, my focus on the reason for a second summons in as many weeks. The house stood on a high hill overlooking the ocean. This was the first time I had ever been to this particular location, and I wondered who it may have belonged to. Some wealthy Muggle, I supposed, long since dead, and the house forgotten by relatives. The Dark Lord always kept Death Eaters in the field, looking for places to hold meetings, places the Ministry could not even begin to find; forgotten places on the sides of hills, in caves, or old abandoned shacks. I sometimes marvelled at the places his minions would find for the meetings.

We stood in the large ballroom, the chandeliers were dark and grimy, but the room still showed the grandeur that once was there. The mirrors, reflecting only the fire from the fireplace, backlit the chair in which the Dark Lord sat, hissing at us as we listened in silence.

"Severus, have you found the correct potion to dispose of that troublesome boy?" His words slithered their way down my spine, and I suddenly felt ill. I was going to be the target again tonight.

With my mind turning over his question, I answered carefully, "I am perfecting the draught that will ensure his death, My Lord. It must appear as if he had an accident as you said. Once I have gathered one final ingredient, I shall brew the potion. Then, it will be a simple matter of brushing the potion onto an object he will touch; a quill, a graded bit of parchment. It is only a matter of time, my Lord. Once he touches it, he will die."

Lucius spoke up at that moment. "What if someone else touches it?" He questioned.

"It will be specific to Potter. I am having difficulty obtaining a vital piece of the formula, My Lord." I replied, focusing my attention to him once again.

Voldemort stood, and came toward me. I stood my ground, and waited while he hissed his displeasure. "What is it, Severus, this vital piece you are having difficulty obtaining?" He questioned.

I stood tall, steeling myself for a curse or a blow. "His blood." I answered quickly, and held my breath as I bowed my head.

He drew a deep breath through the slits which served as nostrils, and straightened his spine. "Not an easy task, I grant you, as we can't access him over the summer. Dumbledore has him well-hidden." He conceded readily enough, and I dared to hope I would be spared further punishment. "See that you aren't all year about it. I am growing weary of your excuses."

"I can't help but wonder why it is that you could not find a way to get Dumbledore to reveal Potter's whereabouts to you. You are as skilled at Legilimency as I am, Severus." He paused, and assessed me carefully, and I could feel him sifting through the recesses of my mind. I prayed that he would search no further than my knowledge concerning the topic of discussion, and silently sighed in relief when he retreated, satisfied for the time being. "I am beginning to seriously doubt your intentions."

"I assure you, My Lord, I will see it finished soon." I murmured, bowing before him. "I have already set my plan in motion to capture what I need. He will be returning to the school within the week, and I will proceed."

Voldemort walked slowly around the area, ranting about one thing or another, his wand drawn as he pointed at several of the devotees standing around the room. I stood apart from everyone else, watching him from the corner of my eye, and waiting for what I knew was to come. I knew there was no way he would simply allow me to leave without some form of punishment for my delay.

The curse hit me in the back, and I went to my knees, as the word Crucio whispered past my ears. My body began to flail as the Dark Lord stood over me, wand pointing at me, my limbs jerking and twitching as I writhed on the floor. I knew better than to try to brace myself against the effects of the curse, the damage would be severe enough as it was. I refused to give in to the urge to scream out my pain or beg for mercy as so many others would do. For that, he was especially vicious with me. My nerve endings were on fire as the curse wended its way through my system. My brain registered the fact that my eyes felt as if they were melting within my skull, and I inwardly sighed in relief when the blackness of oblivion took over.

The meeting ended some time after midnight. I heard Voldemort dismiss everyone as I slowly regained consciousness, and came to my knees. "Do not disappoint me again, Severus, or it will mean your death." He hissed sibilantly, and ordered me to leave.

I staggered through the outer door on shaking legs, and paused on the steps, gulping lungs full of the cool night air, trying to clear my head, and calm my frayed nerves so I could apparate back to my home.

Lucius stepped from the shadows behind one of the columns to the left, and handed me a flask. "Here, drink this. It will help with the pain."

I took the flask, and sniffed at it suspiciously, then realized it was only firewhiskey, and took a tentative sip. "Thank you." I murmured gratefully, handing it back to him with a trembling hand.

"You only make it harder on yourself, you know." Lucius murmured reprovingly, taking the flask from me, wiping the mouth, and tipping it back to take a drink himself. "Would it kill you to give him what he's after?"

"Are you referring to grovelling, or do you refer to the Potter brat?" I snapped derisively. He merely tilted his head, and smiled evilly. "He will get Potter when I am sure that this potion will actually do the job. Hell will freeze over before I grovel at his feet." I added with finality, and immediately apparated away.

"You look like Hell!" My shaving mirror grumbled derisively the next morning, just as it does every morning. "Why do you insist upon doing that?" It questioned insistently. I bared my teeth, refusing to discuss it again, and turned away. The glamour would remain until it no longer served a purpose. I had worn it for so long, I had nearly forgotten my own face.

I set the shower to run hot, stripped out of my clothes, and stepped into the stinging spray. It soothed the tension in my shoulders and neck, and I found myself relaxing a bit as it beat down on my back. My mind turned to thoughts of America, and I suddenly wished the water could wash those thoughts away as easily as it had washed away my tension. I shoved them into the deepest recesses of my mind, and, determined to keep them there, I stepped out of the shower, and stalked from the room.

After dressing, I apparated just outside the gates of Hogwarts. I made the long walk up the hill to the front door, and when I reached the steps, Albus was waiting at the top of the stairs to greet me.

"Severus, my boy, welcome back. How was your summer?" His blue eyes twinkled as he gazed at me with a smug smile.

"You know bloody well how it went, you old goat!" I snapped irritably, and graced him with a scowl as I passed. "Never do something like that to me again! I am quite capable of deciding for myself when I want, or need, a vacation. You do not need to send me off, chasing at shadows!" He merely chuckled, and shook his head as I made straight for the dungeons. I slammed the door with a loud bang that rang through the lower corridors. "Blast and Damn!" My mind was in turmoil as I strode angrily to my desk, and threw myself into my chair.

A moment later, there was a knock on the door, and with a flick of my wand, it swung open. I glared as Albus entered the room, and approached my desk. "Severus, you hurried away before I was able to impart some news to you that should almost make you happy." He looked meaningfully over his glasses at me, not happy with my surly attitude, no doubt. 'Tough.' I thought churlishly, not ready to play nice in the least.

"What news would that be, Headmaster? Another mission, perhaps? A wild goose chase to Romania?" I questioned, feigning interest in what he had to say to me. I was still angry over being manipulated by him, and he knew it.

He shifted in discomfort, and stepped closer. "No. I have a new teaching assignment for you this year. Our circumstances have me needing to replace you as Potion's Professor. I have been compelled to bring Horace back to teach Potions this year."

"Slughorn?" I yelped incredulously, leaning forward in my chair. "For what purpose?"

"I believe he is key to this matter of the horcruxes." Albus murmured thoughtfully. "As of now, he will be teaching Potions, and you will be teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts, Severus."

"Defence..." I stammered uncertainly, not a party to believing in the curse placed on the post, but wondering how far he would allow me to go with the lessons. For me, the job was a dream come true. But, before my happiness with the post could spread any further than the reaction to the announcement, my mind took in the bigger picture. "You think this is it for us both." I murmured solemnly. "That is why you have given me this post, my last chance, as it were."

"Don't be absurd, Severus." He chided, sounding annoyed or possibly, disappointed. "I need a Defence Professor for the coming term. I also need Horace close at hand long enough to discover his secrets. Between the two of you, you're the better man for either position, if you want to know my true opinion on the matter, but Horace only knows Potions. That leaves you to take over as Defence Professor." He blinked innocently, and I scowled. He made it sound like a matter of logic, but, I had serious doubts to that being his motivation.

Forcing myself to focus on preparing for classes after he left me, I was soon immersed in the business of creating a list of subjects which would give Potter the most valuable information, while appearing to be a simple class assignment to everyone else.

* * *

I stood in the shadows, observing the students as they came into the room. I watched Potter and Draco the closest. I needed to see how each would react to the situation. I knew it wouldn't be a wholly accurate assessment of their instinctive reaction to entering an unknown situation, but it would have to do.

Draco carelessly sauntered into the room, and took a seat in the front, assuming he was safe because he was in familiar surroundings. He looked about himself in curiosity, but entirely too confidently. His sidekicks lumbered in, blindly following, and took their places to either side of him. I would choose him as my victim.

Potter had come to an uneasy halt just inside the door, annoying several of the students who were required to step around him. His entourage also halted, anxiously inspecting their surroundings, but looking to their comrade to set their course. I watched him shift gears, his hand hovering near his wand, and senses alert because of the unusual situation. He, too, inspected the darkened classroom, however, his gaze was suspicious, where Draco's had merely expressed mild curiosity.

'Very good, Potter.' I allowed in silent approval. I would never dare to acknowledge him out loud, not in a class filled with Death Eater's children.

When the students had more or less settled, I released the Boggart with a silent wave of my wand. The fact that Draco chose to perch dead-centre to the front of the class was perfect for my plans. As soon as the Boggart emerged, it morphed into the image of Voldemort. The classroom erupted into utter chaos, and I gripped my wand just in case I needed to intercede.

Potter immediately stepped forward in true Gryffindor style, and the Boggart instantly transformed into a Dementor. "Ridikkulus!" He shouted, and the Boggart erupted into a shower of sparks, which dissipated quickly, and the young man glanced in Draco's direction, earning himself a sneer. He shrugged, and took his seat as I brought the candles to light in the room.

Order was restored as soon as I appeared at the top of the stairs, and they shifted uneasily as I descended. "I suppose a Well done, Potter. is in order." I murmured sardonically. "However, as I am not in any way inclined to dole out praise to an arrogant Gryffindor, I will merely acknowledge that your actions were tolerable at best. Now, everyone take your seats before I deduct 100 points from each house." I snapped, addressing the class in general, and they scrambled to find their places.

I mentally rolled my eyes a moment later as Granger's hand reached for the ceiling. "Yes, Miss Granger." I acknowledged her in annoyance.

"Professor, we learned about Boggarts from Professor Lupin in third year." She announced in her helpful tone of voice.

"I am well aware of that, Miss Granger." I replied, gritting my teeth. "However, this lesson has nothing to do with handling a stray Boggart."

By the end of the day I had a massive headache. My temples throbbed with every beat of my heart, and I sought the privacy of my rooms. Muttering to myself, I went to the potion's cabinet in the loo, and the mirror immediately began its incessant babbling about my face. I snarled, and told it to shut the Hell up as I banged the cabinet door shut, and winced in pain. "Bloody know-it-all mirror, just as bad as that Granger twit." I grumbled as I quickly downed the potion, and went to my chair.

I settled back with a heavy sigh, and reflected over my first day as Defence Professor. For the most part, I was satisfied by what I had seen from the various levels. The 7th years were already skilled with silent spell work, and I had no doubts that the class would be a success. The 6th years had been given a taste of proper defensive spells thanks to the fiasco from their 4th year. I felt they, too, were well on their way to adequately defending themselves. The lower classes were as I expected, with none of them standing out above the rest in proficiency.

I reflected over the differing reactions I had observed from Mr. Malfoy and Mr. Potter. Draco had not surprised me in the least. He had the puffed-up peacock portion of his father's ego perfected, right down to the last platinum strand of hair on his head. But, Draco would never master the magical skills of his sire. He was a coward, and I needed to speak to Albus as soon as it could be arranged. We were facing complete disaster if we did not plan things carefully for his demise.

Potter, on the other hand, loath as I was to admit it, was just as proficient, and cool-headed, as James Potter had been when it came to defence. He showed that, clearly, in the way he had faced, and disposed of, the Boggart that morning. "There may be hope for our world yet, Mr. Potter." I murmured thoughtfully as I made my way upstairs to the Great Hall for dinner.

* * *

As the school year slowly passed, I found myself dancing attendance to both masters once again. It was getting more and more difficult to keep Voldemort at bay when he insisted upon results from the potion I was supposedly creating for him. I was running out of excuses, and his punishments were increasing in intensity, and duration, the more frustrated he became with me. Although I suffered a physical beating due to my continued failure, which landed me in the infirmary for almost a week, I was relieved when he finally gave up on the idea of allowing a potion to eliminate Potter, and decided to do it himself.

The Headmaster stubbornly insisted that there was nothing to be done for his situation, and ordered me to keep an eye on Potter and Malfoy. Potter was distrustful, impulsive, and misguided, and a bloody pain in the arse. The fact that Albus kept vital information from the boy, did not make my job any easier. We argued constantly over his insistence in protecting the child. We argued constantly over his determination to keep me from helping him find a cure for the curse that afflicted him. We argued constantly over how to proceed with Draco, and his assignment...Hell, we just argued constantly! Most of my days ended with a massive headache, and I found myself having to brew almost as much headache potion in one term as I usually did in an entire year.

Despite Albus' insistence that there was nothing to be done for him any longer, and the fact that he ordered me to focus my efforts toward a future free of Voldemort's influence, I continued to brew and experiment with my concoctions as best I could.

I had decided to try covering my cauldron with the current blend of ingredients, allowing the brew to simmer gently, and capture the steam within. When my timer went off, I carefully raised the lid, and allowed some of the steam to escape before I poked my nose over it. As soon as the stench reached my olfactory senses, I slammed the lid back in place, and raced for the loo.

Tears were streaming down my face, and my nostrils burned from the acrid smell. My stomach had immediately begun to roll as the scent of human decay had assaulted me. Gasping for breath after emptying my stomach, I muttered "Merlin help us if that is it.", and made my way back to the lab.

I came to an abrupt halt just inside the door when I spotted Draco standing near the front of the lab with his arm over his mouth and nose. "Merlin's Balls, Professor! Did one of the bodies get dug up?"

"Language, Mr. Malfoy." I growled, flashing him a warning glare. "I am attempting to discover a cure for the curse from which our Headmaster suffers." I explained as I saved a sample of the brew, and disposed of the rest.

"What would be the point to that?" He asked, raising an elegant eyebrow. "He isn't going to last that much longer either way."

"Do you really think that you are capable of killing a wizard as powerful as Albus Dumbledore?" I sneered balefully. "You do not have a chance, Mr. Malfoy. As skilled as your father is, I doubt even _he_ could do it."

"Maybe not." He shrugged carelessly. "But it doesn't really matter, does it, Professor? Because that's what youre here for. It's up to you to make sure **_we_ don't fail."**

I slowly prowled closer to the arrogant whelp, staring into his spoiled, pretty, face, advancing on him until he took a step back, and swallowed in fear. "I am here to suit my own purposes, Mr. Malfoy. I have my **_own_ agenda in mind. Do not ever think that I am here for the likes of ****_you."_ I moved away, and he watched me intently for several moments.**

"Your own agenda, Sir?" He whispered hoarsely, taking a step closer to my worktable. "What are you going to do?"

"That, I can not tell you, Mr. Malfoy." I murmured, my mind now centred on my notes. "But, I can guarantee that you will know when the time comes." I forced myself to look at him, and flash a reasonable facsimile of a smile.

A knowing look came to his face, and he grinned as if he were privy to a magnificent secret. "I understand, sir." He replied, and shifted his stance. "I came here tonight to ask a favour of you, sir."

"Mr. Malfoy, I am not in the habit of, nor inclined, to granting favours to any student." I admonished dryly.

"I know, sir, but this isn't for school." He stammered uneasily.

I laid my quill aside, and focused my full attention on the young man's face. "What is it that you ask of me, then?" I questioned, wondering if he might be up to some dirty shenanigans.

"I want you to sponsor me, sir." He blurted, and anxiously wiped his palms on his trousers. "Father isn't allowed, and..."

"No." I cut in abruptly. "I will not sponsor you, Mr. Malfoy."

"But sir, I am to take the mark at the next new moon!" He argued, a slight whine to his tone.

"Sponsoring means taking responsibility for you afterward, Draco." I explained tiredly. "I can not do that if I am incapable of taking care of myself."

"Meaning what?" He asked bluntly, and I suspected it was an automatic question. If he had put more thought into it, he would know what I meant.

"I am quite sure your father has gloated over my punishments of late, so you are well aware of why I would be unable to take on more responsibility that night. You will need to find someone else to look after you, Mr. Malfoy. Perhaps your aunt will step in on your behalf. I would ask her." I stated in a matter-of-fact tone, and turned back to my work, dismissing him in silence. I didn't look up until I heard the door softly click shut behind him. I sighed heavily in resignation, and made my way to the Headmaster's office, leaving the house elves to clean up after me.

* * *

"Severus." Albus greeted me solemnly, the look on my face alerting him to the gravity behind my unexpected visit. "Something has happened." He stated simply. "Sit down, and tell me."

"I have just had a visit from Mr. Malfoy." I announced quietly. "Apparently he is determined to take the Mark upon the next new moon."

"I see." He murmured, shifting in his seat, fingers steepled thoughtfully. "Do you suppose you can persuade him to hold off a bit longer?"

"That would seem suspicious." I countered. "I am a Death Eater, myself. One would suppose me to be encouraging, and supportive."

"Yes. I suppose you are right." He murmured sadly, and sighed regretfully. "I assume he came to you for a reason?"

"Yes." I replied sharply. "He wished for me to sponsor him...after."

"And will you?" He asked, his tone anxious.

"No, Albus." I replied, shaking my head. "For reasons you are aware of, I am sure. Not only do I refuse to be a party to anyone else making this monumental mistake, I can not guarantee that I will be capable of actually helping Mr. Malfoy through the process."

"I am concerned about you, Severus." Albus eyes had lost their sparkle. "Voldemort continues to be suspicious of you, and I fear we may have to do something to change his mind about your loyalty in order to keep you safe."

"What would you suggest, Headmaster?" I enquired derisively. "After the fiasco at the beginning of the term, nothing short of handing Potter to him on a platter is going to redeem me in his opinion, and we both know that I am not about to do that!"

"I am still surprised that you continue to live through each encounter." He admitted, shaking his head. "I fear we all are running out of time." He whispered, gazing at his blackened appendage.

"Sir." I began hesitantly, knowing he would be angry over what I was about to say. "I have another..."

"No, Severus." He cut me off. "I am tired, and I have no desire to try another of your foul concoctions!" His voice rose in anger, but I persisted, and removed the vial from my pocket.

"This one might work, Sir." I insisted, holding it out to him. "I am not a man who will beg, Albus, you know that. But, if that is what is required of me to get you to try, I will." He hesitated a moment, and I whispered pleadingly, hope filling my chest, and making it ache. "Please, Albus."

He leaned forward, and took it from me, inspecting the contents in curiosity. When he grabbed the stopper, I quickly instructed, "I would hold my nose, Sir, before you open that."

"That bad, hmm?" He murmured, eyeing the vial warily. "I suppose it tastes just as foul as it smells?"

"I could not get close enough to tell." I replied, looking away, and holding my breath as he pulled the cork from the bottle.

"Not too bad." He remarked neutrally after swallowing it down, and I knew he was lying in an instant.

"I am sorry, sir." I murmured. "How do you feel?"

"How should I feel?" He countered.

"I would imagine there will be a certain amount of nausea. How severe would depend upon your stamina, I suppose." I mused thoughtfully. "There may possibly be some form of activity near the affected limb, as well. I am not sure if there will be re..."

"Severus!" Albus gasped, and my words jammed in my throat as my attention was drawn to Albus' arm. Right before our eyes, the limb transformed into healthy tissue.

"How do you feel?" I asked straight away, giving him a critical eye. "Any pain? Nausea? Cramping?"

"There's a slight tingling in my hand, and a bit of nausea." He replied after assessing himself. "But, I feel fine. You can go back to what you were doing if you like."

"We do not know how this potion will affect you, or how the poison will react to it, or even **_if_ there will be a reaction to it." I argued plaintively. "I shall remain with you in either case, until I am assured of your safety and well-being."**

"As you wish, Severus." He nodded simply. "Shall we remove ourselves to my sitting room? We may as well be comfortable while we wait."

I followed him in silence, and made myself comfortable in a large, overstuffed chair. He summoned a house elf from the kitchens, and ordered that our dinner be brought to his tower.

"I am not so sure that eating would be wise for you." I cautioned mildly. "You may want to wait, and be sure that there will be no adverse reactions to taking this potion."

"I feel just fine, Severus." He argued mildly once again. "In fact, the tingling has subsided, and the nausea hasn't gotten any worse. I think that perhaps a bit of food just might quell that sensation." Against my better judgement, I allowed him to enjoy his dinner.

I knew the moment when he no longer felt fine. His face turned ashen, and sweat broke out on his brow. "Severus, I do believe I'm going to be ill." He muttered as he staggered to his feet, and made his way down the hall to the loo. I quickly caught up to him, and offered my assistance, as he was trembling violently by that time.

I stared in horror into the bowl. The contents of his stomach appeared as a black, oily, substance, that began to bubble violently as soon as it touched the water. "I'm sorry, sir." I murmured lowly as he drew back, and leaned against the wall. "I had no idea this would be the reaction."

"There is no need to apologize, Severus. Despite appearances, I am already beginning to feel better." He admitted, sounding quite pleased, and so I was reassured that this was the right course to take.

"Is there anything I can do for you, Albus?" I questioned solemnly, placing my hand upon his shoulder.

"No, my boy, you are already doing all you can do." He shook his head, coming to his knees, and retching once more.

Between bouts of vomiting, I would quietly question him, curious to know how he was feeling. If he could feel more changes occurring at all. The only thing he reported was feeling as if he were rejuvenated, and not ill at all. It puzzled me, because he appeared to be suffering greatly from the effects of the potion. When he had been free from the bouts for an hour, he suggested that we try to get some sleep. I agreed, and settled into the bedroom he led me to. The next morning, when I awoke, he was already up and dressed for the day.

"Good morning, my boy!" He greeted me cheerfully as I gave him a critical inspection. "I assure you Severus, I feel better than I have in years! I am full of more energy than I've felt in a very long time."

I refused to relent until I had given him a thorough examination. I was no medi-wizard, but I had enough knowledge to judge whether or not he was suffering from any lingering ill effects. I had to admit that his eyes were shining brightly, and twinkling madly, reminding me of the man he had been when I first came to Hogwarts in my youth. He appeared to me, younger, and stronger, as well. I leaned back, and returned my wand to my sleeve.

"Well?" He asked, his eyes on high-beam. "Will I live?"

"Absolutely astounding." I murmured softly. "You have the physique of a man who is at least 50 years younger!"

"Really?" He exclaimed happily. "I really must admit, Severus, that I do indeed feel as if I am that young. But, this poses us another problem."

"Yes, I know." I remarked wryly. "You are no longer quite so ready to die."

"Indeed." He nodded. "I feel wonderful, Severus. I did not realize how much of a toll this curse was having on me until I was freed from it. I really feel as if I have more to offer before my life is over. How do you propose we pull this one off? Voldemort must believe that Mr. Malfoy has eliminated me, or that you have."

"I agree, but I'm not sure how to proceed, sir." I admitted quietly.

"I insist that it appear that Voldemort has succeeded in killing me, Severus." He ordered solemnly. "Mr. Potter must believe that I am dead!"

"Why?" I asked in surprise.

"I want him to have the determination to destroy him. Harry must think that I am dead in order to keep him strong enough to do this." He answered calmly.

"No." I growled. "This is too far. I've agreed to go along with nearly everything you've tried to do, old man, but this is too much. I won't go along with it." I stated firmly, crossing my arms, and glaring at him in anger.

"You must, Severus." He insisted. "The boy needs to finish this. The only way he will find the strength is to feel he is avenging my death."

"No." I repeated firmly. "It's too much for the child, Albus. He'll be ruined!" I cried, for the first time in my life, actually concerned for the boy's well-being.

"Severus." He stated sharply. "I really must insist that you allow this to happen."

"If you go through with this, I am done. I will no longer dance for you like a puppet on a string." I snarled in anger, and jumped to my feet. "I will not be a party to destroying the boy for the sake of destroying the man. I will not!" I threw over my shoulder. and bolted from the room.


	6. Returning to Life

CH 5 ~ Returning to Life

As dawn approached I stood in the Astronomy tower overlooking the grounds of Hogwarts. My mind was turning over the words of the Headmaster. "Bloody bastard!" I spat, thinking back over what he'd said. 'Not telling Potter that the old bastard still lived was not in my plans.' I thought angrily. "Why can't he just tell the brat!" I grumbled under my breath. "Because then his manipulations would be for naught!" I murmured angrily, answering my own question, as I took a turn around the room once more before coming back to the window. The sun was just beginning to lighten the sky over the lake while I watched the giant squid raise his large tentacle, and slap it once more into the water.

When I turned toward the door, a small movement just outside the grounds caught my eye. I watched as Draco Malfoy made his way along the perimeter, and up to a hidden door.

"Blast!" I snarled as I raced to the stairs that would lead me to the dungeon, and the door where the Malfoy brat would enter.

By the time I reached the main Slytherin corridor, Draco was already sneaking his way back to the dormitories. I silently slipped up behind him, and grabbed him by the arm. "Trying to earn yourself a detention, Mr. Malfoy or are you hoping to simply lose valuable house points?" I murmured nastily as he struggled to break free of my grasp. "Where have you been? I saw you skulking back into the school."

"I had to meet with my mother to get further instructions." Draco sneered arrogantly. "It's almost time for me to fulfil my destiny."

"Don't be an idiot, fool boy!" I growled in anger. "Your destiny is to fail! The Dark Lord knows it, and your death will only serve as a punishment for your father's failure!"

"I've been promised great things when I complete this task." Draco boasted with a superior air.

"Great things." I murmured lowly. "Tell me, Draco. Why would Voldemort need you to kill the Headmaster? The old man is dying **_anyway!_ He is ordering you to kill him, knowing full well you are no match for Albus Dmbledore, simply so he can order your death to punish your father for being captured at the battle in the Department of Mysteries!"**

"What reason would he have to punish my father?" Draco questioned sneeringly. "My father has always been one of his most loyal followers. He wasn't the only one there who failed in the endeavour. Not only that, you're working for a way to cure the old fool!"

"You are right. He has always been sure to stand closely with the side who has the power." I nodded slowly. "But, your father has an ego the size of Portsmouth, and Our Lord will not allow anyone to position himself anywhere near him as an equal, especially after he was fool enough to get himself caught, and thrown into Azkaban right when the Dark Lord needs him the most! Your father has always supposed too much, and has forgotten his place." He stood looking at me with a calculating expression on his face, and a shadow of doubt clouded his eyes.

"Though I may search for a cure to the Headmaster's curse, that in no way means I will find one. My ego isn't quite as all encompassing as your father's. Get to your bed, it's late. Do not leave these grounds again without telling me, Draco. I can not help you if you sneak around behind my back. Now go."

The order angered him, but he nodded with the minimum of respect, and murmured, "Sir." I watched him disappear behind the hidden entrance to the dorm before making my way to my rooms. He had lied to me. There was no way he had met his mother. She was being watched closely by the Ministry, as well as the Order. I would have known about it before he'd even reached her. "What are you up to, Draco?" I murmured softly as I settled in my bed.

* * *

The death of Albus Dumbledore was traumatic for me. He had been like a father to me most of my life. Little did I know he was only using me, and Potter, as game pieces in his little deception. It had been his plan to have me kill him all along, no matter what I did to keep him alive. With the death of the Headmaster, I was eventually appointed to the post, and took up the position, being watched by the Carrows. I suspected then, that the Dark Lord had his doubts as to how loyal I was, but I had no proof.

At every turn, I saw minute things that could all lead to distrust by the Dark Lord, and so, I began to gather the items I would need to escape when he decided I was no longer a help to his cause, but a hindrance.

I worked nights to secure a portkey, something innocuous that no one would think twice about, and hid it carefully within my robes. I had potions to help should I become poisoned or cursed, and they, too, were hidden deep within my robes for safe keeping.

As the last days drew near, the Carrows stepped up their abuse of the students, and their surveillance of me. I could no longer go anywhere within the castle without an escort. It unnerved me that they were ordered to watch me. The Dark Lord explained that it was for my protection, but I suspected that he did not trust me any longer. The guards attested to that quite clearly in my mind.

When I was summoned to the shrieking shack, I knew that this was the day I was to die. My heart raced as I tried to recall all I had placed within the robes I wore. My fingers itched to touch things, and assure myself that my help was still in place. But, I dared not move as the Dark Lord prowled around the room. His damnable snake was suspended in a bubble near the ceiling, and floated behind his every step.

My heart lurched within me when the Dark Lord calmly addressed me. He regretted what he must do. He appreciated my years of loyal service, but he was afraid that my death was imperative in order for him to carry out his plans. He hadn't discovered my duplicity after all, he was simply after the Elder Wand! 'Figures!' I thought sardonically. As soon as the hiss left his mouth, the bubble containing the huge snake lowered, and encased my head and shoulders. I was helpless to fend off Nagini's bite, and I knew that this was it if I didn't reach the contents of the phial in my robes within a few minutes.

My fingers closed around it, and before I could open it, Potter was there, hovering over my prone body. Thinking quickly, I began to release the lifelong memories of his mother, my dearest friend, ordering him to take them. While he was distracted with the task of gathering them into a flask, I was able to coat my fingers with the potion, and press them to the bite on my neck. The room began to grow dark as I slipped away... I feared I was too late as Potter left, and I touched the portkey, whispering, "Rachel..."

* * *

I rang the bell as soon as I arrived on the tree-lined street, and waited impatiently for Alberta or someone, anyone, to open it to me. I looked about the front garden while I waited, and noted that the place was still being kept neat and tidy by someone. I felt a pang of some foreign emotion as I considered another man taking my place here. I refused to admit it was jealousy.

The door opened on silent, well-oiled hinges, and Cassie's mouth dropped open in shock. "Devon!" She exclaimed, and a broad grin graced her face. "Oh my gosh! You're the last person I expected to see here! Come in! Come in!" She beckoned, backing away, and allowing me to enter the main hallway.

"Cassie." I bowed slightly. "It is a pleasure to see you again."

The kitchen door swung open, and Alberta stuck her head around to see what the commotion was all about. The same expression of shock came to her face, immediately followed by the brightness of tears as she came toward me with her arms wide open. "Devon." She exclaimed breathlessly. "What a thrill to see you again! How are you?"

I waited for her to release me before I answered. "Alberta, it is a pleasure to see you again as well. I trust all is going well enough for you here?"

"As well as can be expected. You know that." She demurred as she took my arm, and led me to the kitchen. "Are you hungry? Would you like something to eat?"

"No, thank you." I replied. "I can not stay for long. I am here to find Rachel, and Danielle. I'd like to know where they went, if I may?"

"She's, uh, she's gone, Devon." Alberta stammered, glancing in my direction with a confused look upon her face. "Rachel and Danielle have gone back home."

"Home?" I whispered as I felt the blood drain from my face. "She went back?"

"Well, yes, Devon." Alberta frowned in confusion. "It is her home. She wanted to go back."

My brain was scrambling. I could not understand why she would give up, and go back to that life. She had everything going for her when I had left two years ago. She was determined, and strong, her plans in order. She had even filed for divorce from her husband! What on Earth had changed her mind?

"How could she want to go back to that life?" I exclaimed in horror. "She had filed for divorce. She was free! I do not understand why she would go back to him." I shook my head sorrowfully.

"Devon." Alberta spoke gently, taking my arm. "She hasn't gone back to her husband. She simply took over their home as was her right because of having custody of Danielle."

I searched her face, and she smiled softly. "I knew you cared. I thought you cared too much back then. They really missed you, Devon. Danielle was heart-broken when you left so abruptly."

"I was not ready for her, Alberta." I admitted quietly. "The timing was all wrong." It still may be wrong, but I shook my head. "How do I find her?" I asked. "Does she even want to be found by me? Are they doing well?"

"Rachel blamed herself for your abrupt departure." Alberta informed me as we settled at the kitchen table, and she passed me a cup of coffee. "She never went into details, and I didn't pry." She paused, waiting expectantly for me to fill in the blanks.

I drew a deep breath, and cast an anxious look over my shoulder toward the door. When I turned back around, Alberta was studying me, her eyes clouded with concern. "She," I paused, and changed direction. "I am an extremely private person. I keep much of what I am thinking and feeling hidden deep within myself."

"Devon, you don't have to explain this to me." Alberta cut in quickly, placing her hand on my forearm. "I understand your need for privacy a lot more than I think you give me credit for."

I nodded sharply in understanding, and with a great deal of disquiet, I opened up to her, and admitted how I felt. "I did not handle that last night very well, and my departure reflected my urgent need to flee the situation." Alberta rose, and busied herself with preparing tea as I had taught her when she saw I hadn't touched the coffee, and I flashed a brief smile of gratitude. "Rachel...theyhave never been far from my mind since the moment I left. It has taken me this long to sort out my feelings, something I have never allowed myself to explore. I think you understand why without my actually having to say it."

"Yes, I do, Devon." She smiled, pouring the boiling water over the tea leaves, and setting the lid to steep. "I told you, long ago, that I understood what you were thinking, and how you were feeling. I want you to know that you have nothing to be ashamed of, Devon. You were a child. A victim. You have the right to feel you must protect yourself from hurt and pain."

She paused when I snorted derisively, then shook my head to dismiss it, letting her know I would not explain my reasons for it. If she only knew the lengths I had gone to in order to protect myself. If she only knew the lengths I'd continued to go to after I'd left, and the hurt and pain associated with them! But, I could never share that with her. She would not understand. I left a short time later, a slip of paper with Rachel's address printed on it in Alberta's spindly scrawl.

* * *

I assessed the tiny cottage as I approached from down the tree-lined street. It was an old dwelling, but neat and tidy in appearance. It wore a fresh coat of paint, and flowers were lining the walks. I halted at the edge of the drive, and swallowed hard as I gazed at the house. I started violently when I heard Danielle shriek, "Devon! Devon! Mom! Devon is here!" She shouted excitedly as she raced to me, and slammed herself into my arms. She had grown since I'd last seen her. "Oh Devon, I've missed you so much! Why did you leave?"

I gently set her aside, my eyes trained on Rachel as she hesitantly stepped out onto the porch. Danielle took my hand, and dragged me closer. I stopped at the steps, and studied Rachel solemnly.

"Would you like to come in?" She asked softly.

"Rachel, I...yes." I stammered, and slowly climbed the stairs.

I looked around the small sitting room, and offered a tentative smile. "This is very pretty." I gestured helplessly.

"Is there something I can get for you?" She asked. "Coffee, tea or maybe a soft drink? Are you hungry?"

"Actually, might I have a glass of water, please?" I suggested quietly.

"Sure." She replied. "Make yourself comfortable anywhere you'd like. I'll be right back with that water."

"Devon, are you going to stay for a nice visit?" Danielle asked, bouncing on the sofa beside me.

"I am here to talk to your mother, child." I replied solemnly. "I have some very important things to tell her, and I would like for you to leave us be while I do that. When I am finished, you and I will have a very nice visit. Will that suit you?"

"That would be great!" She replied, jumping to her feet. "I'll be in my room, Devon!" She waved, and ran off through a side door, then I heard the sound of footsteps on the stairs, banging loudly over my head.

I closed my eyes, and rested my head in my hands. I didn't know where I would begin to explain everything to this woman. For two long years, as hard as I had tried to erase my thoughts of her and Danielle, they had remained in the back of my mind. Then, when I'd had the dream, her soft voice, calling out my name...Severus...I knew I had to come back.

"Here you go. Rachel murmured quietly, and I looked up as she held out a tall glass of water to me. "Are you sure I can't fix you something to eat?"

"No, thank you. I just finished eating with Alberta." I replied, unthinkingly.

She frowned, looked up at the clock on the wall, and my heart dropped to my boots. "How could you have just finished eating with Alberta, Devon?" She questioned. "They would barely be finishing with lunch right now! It's nearly an hour's drive to here from there! And, I didn't see a car. We don't have taxi service here from the city. How did you even get here?"

I drew a deep breath, and stared at the floor as I slowly let it out. This wasn't going according to the way I had it all planned, and I needed to gather my thoughts. "It's complicated, and I'm afraid you might not understand." I admitted softly.

She sat up straighter beside me, and said, rather stiffly, "Why don't you try me."

"Tell me something, first." I ordered in reaction to her tone. "Do you believe in magic? I'm not talking sideshow hocus pocus, I mean real magic."

"Wizards and witches, and casting spells, things like that?" She questioned, tilting her head curiously, and I merely nodded. "I'm not really sure if I do." She admitted calmly, then laughed softly. "I know there has been a time or two when I wished I could wave a wand!"

"They do come in handy." I murmured, watching her carefully for her reaction.

"You're serious." She whispered in shock. "Are you? Can you do magic like that? It is real?"

"Yes, Rachel." I barely breathed my reply. "I am completely serious. I am a wizard."

"I don't know if I believe you, Devon." She murmured solemnly.

"Shall I prove it to you?" I questioned calmly. I had expected to have to prove my claim.

"I don't mean to offend you!" She exclaimed, looking horrified. "It's just an incredible notion for me!"

"That is not a problem, Rachel." I smiled grimly. "I expected some scepticism at the very least." I paused and sorted my thoughts. "Before I do anything else, there is something I wish to confess to you."

"Something else, you mean?" She smiled wryly, and I nodded, too nervous to smile in return. "Go ahead." She urged gently, sensing my trepidation.

"I want to make a fresh start with you, and in order for me to do that, I must first reveal my true identity." I stammered uncertainly. "When I came to the Lighthouse, I arrived under false pretences. My name isn't Devon Robinson as I claimed back then."

"What is your name?" Rachel asked softly, her eyes clouded with worry.

"My name is Severus Snape." I replied quickly. "I am a Professor in a private school, but it is private because it is a wizarding school."

"What do you teach?" She asked curiously.

"Potions." I replied. "I am a Master at Potion's brewing."

"You are a wizard, named Severus Snape, and you are a teacher to magical children." She remunerated calmly.

"Yes." I replied. "I came to the Lighthouse at the request of our school Headmaster, in order to spy."

"Now, you're a spy, too?" Rachel questioned in disbelief. "Are you also the Queen of England?"

"This isn't a joke, Rachel." I growled lowly. "Let me finish."

"Alright." She agreed, shifting beside me. "Go on."

"Our world was at war against an evil sorcerer. I was a spy in the war, crossing over the lines between light and dark, passing information to the Headmaster who was the leader of the light wizards." I swallowed, and drew a breath. "I had been called upon by both of my masters, and the Headmaster felt I needed a rest. He came up with the notion that he would send me away for the summer, under the guise of being a spy for the light."

"Wait." Rachel interrupted. "Your masters? You make it sound more as if you were a slave than a spy. Explain that more clearly to me."

"It is irrelevant now." I waved my hand, realizing that I had gotten off-track. "The war is over, the light has won, and the evil sorcerer has been destroyed."

"I see." She murmured. "So, why have you come here?"

"I wanted to let you know that I have never forgotten you or Danielle. I hid my feelings away in a dark corner of my mind to keep you safe while war raged around me. Now that I am free, I could only think of returning to you, hoping there might still be room in your lives for me." I whispered softly, daring to look her in the eyes.

"How many more secrets do you have, Severus?" She calmly questioned. "How many more lies do you have to tell?" Her softly delivered questions cut me deeply, and I was beginning to think that coming here had been a mistake. "You haven't been honest with me since we met. Do you honestly expect me to trust you at all?"

For a crazy moment, I thought to just leave, and then return without my glamour as someone else, and start again. But, I knew that two wrongs didn't make it right, and I sighed. "I have more that you will need to know, but only if I am to remain within your company."

"Within my company?" She repeated in confusion.

"Yes, if I have no future here with you and Danielle, then there is no point in me revealing myself to you completely." I explained solemnly.

"Revealing yourself..." She stammered uncertainly. "What do you mean by that?"

"For one," I indicated my face. "I do not look like this in actuality." I waved my hand, and revealed myself to her, and she gasped in shock.

"Oh my God, you're...! She exclaimed, reaching out to touch my scarred throat, and halting abruptly. "I mean, why do you hide yourself?" I suspected that she had been about to say something about my physical appearance that had the potential to be taken offensively. "You look so different in reality."

"These are a gift from the evil wizard of which I told you. His snake nearly killed me." I replied rather bluntly. "I deliberately wore that dark persona in order to protect myself, and to protect those around me...my students." I replied softly.

"Your students." She repeated, and I knew she was asking for further explanation.

"I deliberately made myself out to be repulsive, cold, and hateful to the children I taught in order to keep them at arm's length, should the Dark Lord become interested in who might be important to me." I explained. "I found myself becoming attached to Danielle, and I could see you were beginning to care about me a little as well, and I had to leave. I couldn't take a chance on him learning that you existed."

"Why not?" She asked immediately.

I just looked at her for a few minutes before I spoke. "He hated Muggles...non-magical humans. If he were to discover that one of his most-trusted servants was attracted to a Muggle, he would have killed you both in the blink of an eye. He quite possibly might have killed me, too."


	7. Explaining Myself

Ch 6 Explaining Myself

I waited, watching Rachel as her eyes went out of focus, and she thought about what I had revealed to her thus far. When she looked to me, I knew in an instant that she was angry. "That's a real whopper you've come up with, _Severus." _She drawled sarcastically, and I waited to hear what else she was going to have to say.

She drew a deep breath, and stood, pacing the floor before me. "So, you drop this bombshell in my lap, and what? Am I supposed to say, Oh, well, that explains everything! Why didn't you just say so? Tell me, Severus, because I really don't know what you expect of me! What do you want? Why did you come here?" She paused a moment, and just as I opened my mouth to speak, she started in again. "I don't even consider the magnitude of the things you've revealed to me; the magic, this war, your role as a spy...I'm gullible...I'll bite. Hell, it even makes some kind of crazy sense! But, what I do not, and can not understand, is how you could _walk away!"_

"I was protecting you." I replied lamely, but she shook her head.

"No...no, you weren't. You were running away, and I want to know why!" She demanded, her voice a low, angry, growl. "I told you that you could trust me." She began, and then shook her head, and began again. "How could you walk away like that, Dev...Severus? You had to have heard her calling to you! And you just kept going!" I bowed my head in shame as I thought back to that day, and the pain I had caused when I just kept going. "Do you even realize the Hell you put that little girl through? She loves you, Devon! Severus..." She growled impatiently, and grew silent for several long minutes.

She drew another deep breath, and calmly pushed on with what she had to say. "I have no problem at all with the idea of magic, and your being a wizard, and learning that the things I grew up believing to be fantasy, are real, none whatsoever, Severus. I actually think that is absolutely amazing, and wonderful. I really do! That is not...none of that upsets me." She paused, and I nodded in understanding.

"In all of this, what bothers me the most are, basically, two things. One, you couldn't or wouldn't, trust me. The circumstances under which we met, automatically cleared several steps into developing an association, a relationship, with someone. The way you helped me, put us into a unique place right from the beginning. I put my trust in you. I told you that you could trust me, and you rejected that!" She drew a deep breath, and let it out before continuing. "That is even, in a way, fine with me. We are adults, and if it is meant to be, we can move past that, and continue to develop whatever will develop. I can wait for you to feel you can trust me." She explained carefully, her voice beginning to quaver as she continued. "But, the pain you put Dani through? She cried for days, Severus. You left her with nothing to hold onto, nothing to reassure her!" She shook her head, and I knew she was furious beyond words.

"I did what I had to do, Rachel." I interrupted quietly. "I would do the same all over again if I had to make the choice. That is something that you are going to have to be willing to try, and understand about me."

"What does that have to do with the way you chose to leave, Severus?" She asked lowly, anger simmering in her tone. "You were so anxious to run to the battle, that you couldn't take a few extra minutes to reassure a little girl who **_loves _you? I don't believe that! Not after I observed how kind you were to her. You were running away, without any explanation for it, and I want to know why."**

"Two years ago, I needed to make a clean break. There was nothing for me to reassure her with." I explained quietly. "I'm not equipped to deal with children, Rachel." I grumbled in frustration. "I've never been married, never had any children of my own. I don't know how to relate to them."

"Severus!" She laughingly scoffed in disbelief. "You're a teacher! You relate to them all the time!"

"It's not the same." I argued bluntly, shaking my head. "I deal with my students in a completely different manner than the way I was forced into dealing with Danielle. For the most part, at least in the beginning, I merely tolerated her."

Rachel came over, and sat beside me, reaching out to take my hand. I shifted uncomfortably with the contact, and she darted a curious glance in my direction before her expression cleared, and she immediately released me.

"Sorry." She murmured apologetically, and I waved my hand dismissively. We sat there for a few minutes, each lost to their own thoughts before she took up again, her voice soft and tender. "Danielle has never had a man in her life that was anywhere near as kind as you were to her. Her own father has nothing but contempt for her, no tolerance for her childish impulses and curiosity at all. You unquestioningly accepted her for who she was, you guided her with a steady, calming presence, and she thrived because of that acceptance, Severus!"

"I didn't do much." I murmured uncomfortably.

"You did exactly what was needed; no frills, no drama, no theatrics." Rachel declared gently. "Dani needed someone strong, and reassuring, and you were there for her. Her angel with big, black wings."

I was stunned to hear that Danielle had revealed our conversation to her. I had nearly forgotten her words from the night they had arrived at the Lighthouse. As I had that night, I wondered once more, what it was about me that gave her the impression that I was an angel with black wings. Before I could comment about it, there was a slamming noise out in the yard, and Rachel went to the window, and peered outside.

"It's Eddie." She whispered, glancing at me as she moved away from the window.

I immediately charmed my appearance, and narrowed my eyes when I saw that Rachel was clearly frightened. I looked upward, hoping that Danielle would remain in her room. I wished that I knew more of the home's layout, because if I had, I'd have been able to put up charms to protect her, and keep her there.

The door burst open, and Rachel's ex-husband stepped through the door as if he belonged there. He was a large, muscular man, obviously a bully, by the mere fact that he walked right in the place. He had a cocky grin on his face, and was greeting Rachel as if they were still married. "Welcome me home, baby." He murmured arrogantly as he took her in his arms, and tried to kiss her.

I remained seated, and watched in silence as the scene played out. Rachel struggled against him, and pushed him away from her, then he spotted me. He released her immediately as an angry flush coloured his face. "Who are you, and what the Hell are you doing in my house?" He demanded angrily, his fists clenched, instantly enraged.

I slowly came to my feet, and drew a deep breath to quell the intense anger that filled my senses. "My name is Devon Robinson. I am part of the organization that helped Rachel gain her freedom. I stopped by to check on her and Danielle to be sure they were adjusting well on their own." I answered him as neutrally as I could manage.

Eddie possessively grabbed Rachel by the arm, and she winced in pain. "Well, as you can see, she is doing just fine. Now, why dont you just be on your way, Mr. Robinson?" He sneered dismissively, and Rachel turned frightened eyes to me, pleading in silence for help. I gazed back at her, steadily, praying she understood that that was exactly what I intended to do.

"I'm afraid that Rachel and I were not quite finished with our conversation, and I have yet to visit with Danielle. You must understand that there is no way that I can leave until I have concluded my business." I stated almost rudely. "Perhaps youd care to leave until we are finished?"

"I don't see any reason why you can't say what you have to say in front of me." He replied arrogantly, releasing her, and settling himself into an overstuffed armchair. "We got nothing to hide, have we, baby?" He added, trying to veil the obvious threat in his words and actions.

I glanced in Rachel's direction before addressing him once more. She was watching me, trembling violently, waiting for me to do something to help her. "I'm afraid I must insist that you leave." I stated lowly, bracing myself for the backlash. "Your presence is not needed, and it is quite obvious that you are not wanted here either." The threat in my tone registered clearly if the look on his face was any indication, and he came slowly out of the chair.

Rachel took a step closer to me in fear, a look of panic in her eyes, and I gently pushed her behind me. "Go upstairs. Keep Danielle up there. Lock the door." I ordered without looking away from Eddie. I saw her nod from the corner of my eye, and heard her as she climbed the stairs.

Eddie took a step in her direction, intending to follow her, and I threatened softly, "I wouldn't, if I were you."

"Well, you aren't me." He sneered, eyeing me, no doubt sizing me up for a fight. It was evident by the look on his face that he had underestimated me due to the differences in our size. "I suggest you mind your own business."

"This is my business. It became my business the day Rachel came to the Lighthouse, beaten and bloodied, seeking refuge. It became my business the moment you walked in here as if you belonged here." I stated, anger creeping unbidden into my tone. "I can clearly see the threat your presence makes here, and I will not let it continue. Leave, now, before this escalates any further." I inwardly sighed, knowing that was exactly what was going to happen. He wasn't the type to just let it go, and when he drew himself up, I braced myself for a fight.

"I don't know who you think you are, buddy, but this is my house, and I'll do as I damned well please!" He roared, turning on me, ready to swing.

"This is Rachel's home, and you no longer have a right to be here." I argued, thankful that I had gained at least that much knowledge of the situation between he and Rachel.

"That's what she'd like to think." He declared bluntly. "But as long as I have to pay the mortgage on it, it, and everything **_in _it, is going to be my property."**

Anger flared hotly in my chest as his meaning became clear. "Get out." I ordered flatly. "Get. Out. Now." He swung, and I ducked, avoiding the blow, and stepping away. I took a defensive stance, and waited for his next move. He took another swing at me, and I slapped him away. "I don't want to fight with you." I stated calmly, as he eyed me once more. "Just leave, and let it go."

"You're the one who doesn't belong here." He roared, and lunged toward me, intending to throw me to the floor. I side-stepped him again, and it only served to enrage him more. He swung at me, and I dropped to the floor. I swung my leg in an arc right at his knees, and he went down hard, rattling the china in the display along one wall.

He took me by surprise when he rolled, and came to his feet without pause, ready to retaliate. He struck with brute force to my midsection, and I felt a rib crack as I grunted softly in reaction. Shoving the pain aside, I returned the blow, and he fell against one of the low tables, snapping one leg off as he landed on it.

As we continued to fight, it occurred to me that he was tiring, and growing winded, proof that he was simply a bully. Whereas, I had been trained to pace myself in a physical fight, and had only just begun to sweat. I smiled to myself, knowing that it wouldn't be long, and he would be defeated. We circled each other, both poised to strike, but he was out of breath.

I assessed him quickly, he was still sufficiently protecting his vulnerable areas from attack, and I knew he'd need to be distracted if I was going to end this. With a surreptitious wave of my hand, the bookcase behind him began to topple, and he stepped away in alarm, his guard dropping immediately.

As soon as his attention was elsewhere, I struck the final blow that brought him down, and hauled him to his feet. I twisted his arm behind his back, and slammed him against the door frame, certain that I had his full attention. "I think that it is time for you to leave here, and not bother to come back." I growled lowly in his ear. "This is no longer your home, whether you pay the mortgage or not. Rachel and Danielle are not your personal property, and the sooner you understand that, the better for you. Am I understood?" He nodded quickly, and I shoved him out the door.

I turned away from the door, and it registered, vaguely, through my pain, that Rachel was standing at the foot of the stairs. I groaned as my knees gave out. "Devon!" She exclaimed in alarm, and before I hit the floor, she was there to catch me, and gently lower me before her.

She jumped to her feet, and retrieved a pillow that had been thrown from the couch when Eddie had fallen back against it. She returned to me, and gently lifted my head, placing the pillow beneath me. "Wait here." She whispered frantically. "I'll call for help, and get something to wash some of this blood away."

"Rachel." I murmured breathlessly, only just beginning to realize my difficulty in breathing. She continued toward the kitchen, and I called again, ignoring the pain in my chest. "Rachel!" She returned to my side, and kneeled, waiting anxiously for me to speak. "I don't need them." I whispered hoarsely. "Give me a minute." I closed my eyes, but they flew open in surprise when I felt her gentle touch to my face.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright?" She asked, her voice quavering tremulously. "You're so bloody, and I can tell you can't breathe very well."

I struggled to draw a deep enough breath to muster the strength to repair the damage, and tried to smile. I know I only managed a pain-filled grimace as I tried to sit up. She hurried to put her arms around me, and lift me up. When I was settled against the wall, she hurried away, and returned a few minutes later with a basin of warm water and a flannel.

"Let me help you." She whispered as she wrung the water from the cloth. She gently bathed my face, studying me intently. She carefully took each hand, and wiped them clean, gasping when she saw the bruises forming on my knuckles. I remained silent, simply allowing her to take care of that much. When she had finished there, she reached out to unbutton my shirt, and I stilled her hands.

She paused, looking into my eyes, trying to read an expression that I deliberately made sure she would never manage. "I need to assess the damage. You may need medical help. What if your ribs are broken?" She whispered frantically, darting a glance toward the stairs. "You may need an ambulance!"

I shook my head, and pushed her away. "I can take care of it myself. Stay a few feet away." I ordered as I pulled my wand from my boot, thankful that it hadn't been damaged in the fight. She looked on with a curious tilt of her head, and I managed a proper smile. "Watch." I held the tip of my wand to my left hand, and whispered a healing spell. Rachel gasped as the bruises disappeared, and she grabbed my hand, turning it over, and inspecting it closely.

"It's that simple for you?" She questioned, turning my right hand over as I finished healing it.

"Well," I paused a moment. "bruises are a rather minor injury. My ribs will take a little more effort on my part." She nodded in understanding, and settled back to watch. My first attempt failed, and I leaned back against the wall until I could catch my breath. I tried again, and failed, shaking my head in frustration.

"What's the matter?" Rachel asked, a worried frown marring her features.

"Can't manage it." I panted, nearly passing out from the increase in pain due to my failed attempts, which were aggravating the condition.

"Do you want me to get help?" She murmured. "Is there something I can do? Someone I can contact for you?"

"No. I need to rest a moment, then try again." I replied, trying to draw a deeper breath.

She reached out, and tried to unbutton my shirt, and I put my hand over hers once again. "Let me look, Severus." She demanded softly. "I'll assess you, and see if we can't come up with some way to help you. I understand that you don't want to call in any help from my world." I nodded briefly, and spots swam before my eyes. I closed them, and fought down a sudden wave of nausea.

She gently opened my shirt, and when she gasped, I opened my eyes to see her hand over her mouth, and tears filling her eyes. "Oh my God, Severus!" She whispered in horror as we both stared at the bone that was nearly erupting from my skin. "Can you do this?"

I fought down another wave of nausea, and swallowed hard. "Help me lie down, Rachel." I whispered quietly.

"Are you sure you should even move?" She yelped in alarm. "It could break through your skin!"

"It may do that anyway." I replied gently, and swallowed again as she nodded, and put her arms around me, lowering me to the floor once more. "No pillow." I stated when she reached for it. "Now, I'm going to need strips of cloth, long enough to wrap around me tightly. Will you see to that for me, please?" I requested.

"Yes. I'll use one of my bed sheets. It should be long enough." She nodded, and hurried away.

I closed my eyes, and drew another breath. I placed the tip of my wand on the protruding bone, and began to chant the healing spell. As expected, when the bone began to move, I felt my skin tear, and gritted my teeth, bracing against the pain. By the time Rachel returned, I was finished, and gasping for breath.

"What do you need me to do now?" She asked, anxiously searching my face. "Have you...is it healed?"

"Not completely. I need you to bind my ribs." I explained, slowly sitting up. She grabbed my shoulders to steady me. When she was sure I was settled, she slipped my shirt off, and began to wrap the strips of cloth around my ribs. "Tightly, Rachel." I ordered. "They can't be allowed to move until the healing process is completed."

When she was finished, she helped me to my feet, and I allowed her to dress me, and button my shirt. When she backed away, Danielle was standing at the foot of the stairs, looking about the room in horror.

"Devon, are you alright?" She questioned tremulously, tears coming to her eyes. "Did my Daddy hurt you, too?"

I went to her, and crouched before her. "A bit, child, but I'm alright, Danielle." I murmured gently. She threw her arms around my neck, and I held her for a moment before pushing her away. "Try not to worry. I told your father that he was no longer welcome here. I would like to say that he will not return, but I do not know him very well." I assessed her for a moment before standing. I turned to Rachel, and addressed my issues once more. "I need a place to lie down for a time. Do you have a spare bed I could make use of?"

"None to spare, but you are welcome to use my bed." She replied, moving to escort me there.

"I will need use of it for...until...tomorrow sometime. I can not take your bed from you." I stammered uncomfortably.

"Oh, I see." She replied nervously. "Do you think you can manage the stairs? You could take Dani's bed, and she can sleep with me for tonight."

"That would be acceptable." I murmured, bowing slightly. "Danielle would you care to show me the way to your room? I need to lie down, child."

"Sure." She replied, taking me by the hand, intending to lead me up the stairs.

"I'll bring you something to eat for dinner later, if you like." Rachel offered tentatively.

"I would appreciate that." I smiled briefly, and shifted uneasily.

I gingerly settled myself on Danielle's narrow bed, and sighed heavily. Danielle grabbed a soft throw from the chair in the corner, and covered me with it, and its warmth immediately seeped into my aching frame.

"I'll see you later, Devon." Danielle whispered, and I startled when she kissed my cheek. "When you are all better, we can finally have our visit." I nodded briefly, and closed my eyes, succumbing to restful sleep.

When I awoke, late afternoon shadows angled across the room, and I lie there, gazing about myself. I rubbed my eyes, and threw back the blanket as I sat up. I assessed myself for a moment, and realized that I wasn't any worse for the wear, and came to my feet. As soon as I opened the door, my nose was assailed by the most wonderful aromas wafting up from the lower level of the house. My stomach growled appreciatively, and I knew I was well on my way to recovery.

When I entered the small kitchen, Rachel looked up and smiled. "Did you rest well?" She asked, turning her attention back to the pot on the stove.

"Yes, I did. Thank you." I murmured, glancing about the room.

"Are you feeling better?" She frowned anxiously, lowering the flame below the pot, before she turned to me. "I would have fixed you a tray, and brought it to you. You didn't have to come down."

"The process has been successful so far." I nodded. "By tomorrow I will be in top shape. I decided to join you for a while." I added hesitantly, surprised when her smile brightened.

"I'm glad." She replied softly, reaching out to touch my arm, and I shifted away. "I'm sorry. I keep forgetting that you don't like being touched." I chose to ignore the apology, finding it didn't require a comment as my feelings on the matter hadn't changed.

I slowly paced the perimeter of the room, taking in my surroundings, aware that she was watching me closely. I stopped before the refrigerator, and studied the various pictures of Danielle on display there. The room was bright and cheerful, much different from what I was accustomed to, but then what I was familiar with wasn't exactly what one would call normal. From the other side of the table, a comfortable distance from her, I turned to face her. "Would you like me to set the table for you?" I asked hesitantly.

"Oh no, Severus!" She mildly exclaimed. "Thank you for offering, but that is Danielle's responsibility. She has gone to wash her hands before she gets started." I nodded in understanding, and shifted my stance in discomfort, glancing about the room in search of something to say to mask the awkward silence.

"Does he intrude that way very often?" I murmured quietly as my thoughts turned to the altercation that afternoon. "Walk right in as if he has a right to be here?"

She bowed her head, and a rush of colour suffused her cheeks. "Yes." She whispered softly. "He walks right in, directly against the protection order. I've given up trying to get the authorities to do anything about it."

Before I could comment, Danielle burst into the room. "You're awake!" She exclaimed excitedly. "How are you, Devon? Did you have a good nap?"

"I am feeling much better, child." I smiled briefly, and cast a solemn glance in Rachel's direction. I supposed that our conversation would be put aside until after Danielle had gone to bed for the night.

Within a few minutes, we were settled around the table, enjoying a thick beef stew with warm, buttered rolls, listening patiently to Danielle's animated chattering. I tried to remain focused on the child, but my mind was preoccupied with their situation. I was anxious to continue my discussion with Rachel, and would cast an occasional, solemn glance in her direction, tempted to use magic in order to read her thoughts.

I was studying her intently when she suddenly looked up, and caught me staring. She smiled briefly, and reached for a roll. I quickly dropped my gaze when I spotted a rather large bruise on her arm, feeling a sense of guilt for which I could find no way to excuse. I had hesitated when I should have acted, and she had suffered from my delay.

No longer hungry, I gathered my dinner remains, and carried them over to the sink. I looked out the window to the back garden, not really seeing it as I weighed my options. I decided to first explain my actions to Danielle, and then I would see to Rachel's injuries. When I turned back to the room, both were watching me curiously, and I cleared my throat. I calmly regarded Rachel for a moment before turning my attention to Danielle. "When you are finished with your dinner, Danielle, there are some things I would like to explain to you." I stated quietly, sliding my gaze once more to her mother. Rachel nodded, drew a deep breath, and smiled, almost sadly.

"I'm finished now, Devon." She announced, quickly clearing her place. Rachel did the same and we made our way into the sitting room. They made themselves comfortable on the sofa' and I paced the room before taking a seat in the chair across from them. The room was still a shambles, but it appeared as if Rachel had attempted to make it presentable for the time being.

"First, I must apologize for the manner in which I chose to leave." I sighed heavily as Rachel took her hand, and smiled gently at her daughter. "I admit that I should have handled it differently. I'm sorry I hurt you, child."

Danielle's gaze dropped to the floor, and I held my breath, not knowing what she would do or say. When she looked up at me at last, her eyes were bright with unshed tears. "I thought I had made you mad at me." She drew a shaky breath, and let it out, struggling to control her emotions.

"I was not angry with you." I replied softly. "You did nothing wrong. I was needed at home, and I had to leave quickly. I should have taken the time to explain it to you." She merely nodded, and waited for me to go on.

I looked to Rachel, hoping she could sense my hesitation over the things I needed to reveal. It was much easier to explain this all to her. "Just go ahead, and tell her like you told me, Severus." She murmured gently, smiling when Danielle looked up in confusion upon hearing my name. She turned to me, and looked me up and down as if seeing me for the first time.

"That is one of the things I wish to tell you, Danielle." I began calmly. "My name isn't Devon as I told you back then. My real name is Severus Snape, and I am a wizard." Her eyes grew wide, and her mouth dropped open in surprise. But it wasn't the reaction I had expected, it was the look one has when something has been confirmed for them.

"Magic?" She murmured in awe, and I nodded. "I knew it!" She exclaimed excitedly. "I saw you! I couldn't sleep the night before you left, and I had come down to get a drink of water, and I saw you! You were walking through the house, and you were doing magic. I wasn't sure because you weren't saying anything, and I didn't see a wand. But you were, weren't you?"

"Yes, I was." I admitted softly. "I knew I had to leave, but there were so many things Alberta still needed done. The only thing I could do, was slip through while everyone was asleep, and repair what I had time to do."

The silence stretched for several minutes while she thought over the things I'd said to her. "Why did you have to leave?" She questioned anxiously.

I carefully considered my answer before I said anything. I wanted to keep it simple for her, and yet, the situation hadn't been simple in the slightest way.

"Explain it the way you did for me, Severus. She will understand." Rachel encouraged me gently.

"There was a war between good wizards and bad wizards going on during the time I was at the Lighthouse." I smiled as she opened her mouth, somehow sensing what her question would be. "I was, and am, a good wizard." She immediately looked relieved, and I continued with my explanation. "I served a double purpose in that war, Danielle. Not only was I a light wizard, but I was a spy, working amongst the dark wizards. It was a very dangerous life for me."

"The war is now over, and the light wizards won, but because of my position as a spy, many in my world believe that I was on the dark side." I paused, and looked to Rachel. She solemnly regarded me, but seemed to be willing to listen to the rest of what I had to reveal to them.

"Are you in trouble?" Danielle whispered in fright.

"No, child." I answered softly. "In my world, they believe me to be dead. I do not think I will ever be able to go home, even though there are things about me that are unknown there."

"What things?" She asked with childlike curiosity, and I quickly glanced at Rachel. She smiled, and nodded, giving me permission to proceed.

"The biggest and most obvious thing is my appearance, Danielle." I replied. "I do not look like this." I waved my hand before my face, indicating my dark persona. "I look like this..." I explained, and passed my hand before me, removing the glamour, and holding my breath, knowing that she would see the terrible scar on my neck.

She slowly came to her feet, staring intently at me, and I watched her with a guarded expression on my face as she came to stand close to me. She bent toward me and looked carefully at my eyes. "Your eyes have green rings around them. I like that." She confessed, her gaze travelling to my hair. She reached out, and stroked the side of my head, and I raised a curious eyebrow. "It's soft like your black hair, but this colour looks better on you." She stepped away, and I relaxed a fraction. "You're not as tanned as you were that summer, but I suppose that's going to change now that summer is back again."

"I have been very ill, Danielle." I murmured gently. "I did not make it through the war without injury. It took me a very long time to recover from this." I pointed at my throat, and she looked closely at the scars there.

"Don't touch, Danielle." Rachel warned when she made to do just that. "It's not polite."

She quickly dropped her hand, and murmured an apology. I struggled with my inner demons for a moment, and gently took her hand, and pressed her fingers to my throat. When I released her hand, she traced a line over the scars, and anxiously looked into my eyes. "Does it hurt much?"

"It doesn't hurt at all, child." I replied honestly. "It did when it happened, and I nearly died, but I am fine now, just scarred."

"Can you use magic and fix it?" She asked curiously.

"I have never tried." I admitted with a shrug. "It didn't seem to matter much if I had them. Do they upset you?"

"I'm upset that you almost died, and we probably never would have known, but I still love you even if you have them." She explained honestly. I idly wondered if all children were so forthright or if it were something uniquely hers. I shifted uncomfortably to realize that I had never bothered to get that close to any of my students to know for sure.

"I suppose I could try to fix them if you'd like me to." I offered solemnly.

"Do you want to?" She asked, tilting her head inquisitively.

"I'm not sure." I admitted honestly.

"Whatever you decide is okay with me, Devon." She replied.

"Severus, sweetheart." Rachel corrected with a tiny laugh.

"Oh yeah. Sorry, Severus!" She grinned, unperturbed by being corrected, and I shook my head.

I looked around the room at the broken items still scattered about, and removed my wand from my boot. "Shall I repair some of this damage for you?" I offered with a quirk of my eyebrow.

"If you'd like, and if you're up to it." Rachel nodded nervously, her gaze shifting to my ribs.

"Not a problem." I replied. "Danielle, please sit with your mother. We don't want you to get hit by a blast of magic." They stared, open-mouthed, as glass fragments fused into vases, and chips of china, became figurines once more. Broken legs reattached themselves to chairs and tables, and books flew through the air to take their rightful places along the shelves.

When I had finished, I crossed the room, and sat beside Rachel. "If you would allow me, I can see to your injury as well." I offered quietly. She nodded, and I gently took her arm. With a light touch, and a whispered spell, the bruise vanished, and she looked at me in wonder.

"Thank you." She whispered gratefully. "That feels much better. But, now I have a question. If you can do all of these wonderful things, why didn't you use your magic on me back then?"

"Believe me, I wanted to, but too many people saw your injuries before I had a chance to act, or I would have." I replied honestly. "I was appalled by the tubes, and wires, and machines they were using, and wished with all my heart that I was capable of rendering you aid. I knew you would have been able to walk out of that room that night, if I could only have gotten to you first." She nodded in understanding, and we fell into another uncomfortable silence, which was broken a moment later by Danielle's next question. "Severus, if you can't go home, where are you going to live now?"


	8. Starting Over

**Ch 7 ~ Starting Over**

"That is the second reason I returned to America." I answered her readily enough. "I know people here. You and your mother, Alberta, Cassie, and the others. I came back to see if there might be a new life for me here."

"With us?" She questioned excitedly, assuming more than I had intended with my answer.

"Danielle!" Rachel exclaimed in horror. "Don't be presumptuous! I'm sorry, Severus." She murmured, a soft blush suffusing her cheeks.

"It's a natural question, Rachel. I am not offended in the least." I stated gently before turning to Danielle. "I can not live with you and your mother, child. It would not be appropriate for me to do that."

"Are you going back to the Lighthouse to work for Alberta?" Danielle asked curiously. "She really missed you after you left, too."

"I am still weighing my options, but I do admit that it would be ideal for me." I replied with a shrug that made me wince. I had forgotten about the pain in my ribs until that moment.

"Can I get you anything, Severus?" Rachel spoke up with immediate concern in her tone.

"I need nothing except for time to heal, Rachel." I murmured quietly. "I'm sure that after a good night's sleep all will be put to rights."

When Danielle's questions had run dry, Rachel sent her off for her nightly bath. As she returned to the room, and sat across from me, I studied her solemnly. "Do you wish for Eddie to return here?" I questioned gently.

"No, I do not." She shook her head vehemently. "Our divorce was final over a year ago, but he refuses to let us go."

"Does he bully you, or does he continue to threaten violence?" I murmured, wary of the answer I would receive.

"He has gotten…physical…with me. He still frightens Danielle every time he is near." She stammered hesitantly, the fear shining clearly in her eyes. "He doesn't care what the court order states. He merely tells me that he owns this house, and he will enter whenever he wants, and…do…whatever he wants."

"Do you mean…"

"Yes!" She cut me off in mid-sentence as she gritted her teeth, and growled the answer in impotent rage.

"I see." I replied with a growl through my own clenched teeth. "We shall put a stop to this immediately." I declared angrily. "He must be made to understand that he can no longer treat you in this manner."

"Don't you think I've tried, Severus?" She cried, tears filling her eyes. "I've tried to reason with him. I've tried to fight with him." She sobbed brokenly. "I'm just not strong enough."

I hesitantly reached out, and took her hand. "Well, I am." I murmured reassuringly. "He will see reason by the time I finish with him. I promise you, I will make sure that you, and Danielle, are safe from this menace."

"You can't be here every minute of every day, Severus." She replied, sounding defeated.

"I promise you." I declared softly. She looked up, and drew a deep breath, nodding to acknowledge my declaration, but I could sense that she couldn't quite believe it to be possible. I released her hand, suddenly uncomfortable with the familiar contact, and leaned back in my chair. She studied her hands for a few moments before she looked up, and noted the time on the old clock on the wall.

"I, um, need to get some sleep. I have to work in the morning." She stated quietly. "Is there anything I can get for you before I go?"

"No, thank you, Rachel." I replied solemnly. "I will be sitting up for a bit longer. If I should need anything at all, I'm sure it will be something I can get for myself."

"Alright." She answered hesitantly.

"If you don't mind me prowling about your kitchen, that is." I added lightly, and she smiled. "I may want a cup of tea before bed."

"No, I don't mind at all." She stared at me for a moment. "I think I'd like it very much if you made yourself to home. I feel very safe having you here. Thank you for all you've done for Dani and me. Goodnight, Severus."

"It was my pleasure." I replied softly. "Goodnight." I watched her walk away, my thoughts swirling in my head as to how I was going to accomplish all I had promised I would.

Danielle's room was on the upper level of the house, and I had a gut feeling that we hadn't seen the last of Rachel's ex-husband. I didn't want to be that far away from them on the main floor if he should return during the night, so I transfigured the sofa into a comfortable bed, and settled in.

I laid there, listening to the night sounds, familiarizing myself with what was normal for the old house as it, too, settled in for the night. I could hear nature outside the window, settling in as well, and as I listened, a quiet, unnatural noise came to my ears. It was a crunching noise, and the quiet sound of an engine idling outside.

When I heard the sound of a door closing, I slipped from the bed, and stood behind the front door in wait. Soon, there was a scraping noise, and the slight rattle of the doorknob. I braced myself as Eddie picked the lock on the door, waiting patiently for him to enter the house.

He came through the door, and carefully closed it behind him. The light from the streetlamp outside allowed me to observe his actions, while keeping my presence shielded in the shadows. He looked around the room, and noticed my makeshift bed, and frowned. He stepped over, and lifted the blankets, a puzzled look on his face.

"Are you looking for me?" I murmured quietly, and he stiffened in surprise before he whirled around, and faced me.

"What are you doing in my house?" He growled defiantly, turning one of the lamps on, and illuminating the room.

"I was invited to stay." I replied calmly. "You, however, are intruding, and no longer welcome here."

"Why don't you call the cops if I'm no longer welcome here?" He taunted menacingly, the smell of alcohol strong on his breath.

"I do not feel the need to call in the authorities." I replied with a snort, backing away from the stench. "I can handle you myself, and I will."

"Sure you can." He retorted with a derisive laugh. "With those cracked ribs I gave you this morning, I highly doubt you're in any shape to handle me yourself."

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye, and turned my head to see Rachel standing in the kitchen doorway. "Go back to your room, and lock the door." I ordered immediately. She nodded, and quickly disappeared from view. "I wouldn't." I snapped in warning as Eddie took a step to follow her. "I guess we'll do this the hard way." I sighed as he continued to follow her, and I went after him.

When he reached the hallway leading to Rachel's room, I grabbed him by his collar, and jerked him off his feet. Slamming him into the wall, I snarled in his face, "Get out of here, and don't come back!" I released him, and shoved him back up the hallway.

He turned on me, and slammed me against the wall, pinning me there with his arm across my throat. He punched at my ribs a couple of times, and laughed. "How'd that feel, lover boy? Not so tough now that you got a little reminder of how that feels, eh?"

I forced myself to remain calm, breathing through the pain until I had it under control. When he reached back to deliver another punch to my midsection, I took the opportunity to grab the arm across my throat, and give it a twist. He roared in pain as his shoulder dislocated, but he managed to give me another solid hit, and I felt a rib crack as I fell against the wall.

"Devon!" Rachel screamed from her doorway, and Eddie whipped around to go after her.

"Get in your room, Rachel!" I roared, angered that she hadn't listened to me. I lurched away from the wall, and grabbed at Eddie again, preventing him from slamming through her door before she could lock it again.

He returned his focus to me, and swung again, but I was ready for him. Every time he would swing, I would take a step back, and slap him away. It served to anger him further, and keep him focused on me. Soon we were back in the sitting room, and moving closer to the door. He lunged toward me, and grabbed me around the waist. I hissed in pain, but didn't let it stop me.

I knew he was going to try to add more injury to my ribcage, and decided to take the initiative, and give a little of it back. Even though he had a firm grip on me, my arms were free, and I started to punch. I felt a very satisfying snap as a rib gave way. He released me immediately, and bent over double, gasping in pain.

I stepped back out of his reach, and caught my breath. When I had calmed a bit, and regained focus, I readied to take up with him once again. "I think it's time for you to go, and sleep this one off." I growled lowly. "You are in no condition to win in a physical fight, despite the fact that I am injured."

He swung at my jaw, missing it by a fraction, and roared in rage when I slapped him away. "I will leave this place when I damned well feel like it!" He ranted furiously. "This is my house, and that is my bed, and I will sleep in it when I want to, and with who I want to!" He declared angrily, still gasping for breath.

"You are going to leave this house, and leave Rachel and Danielle alone. They are _**not**_ your property, and this _**house**_ is no longer your home." I pressed solemnly. "Why don't you wise up, and just get on with your life, and allow Rachel and Danielle to do the same?"

He swung at me in reply to my suggestion, and we faced off again. He managed to get in several good hits, but by the end of it, he was the one who had suffered the most damage, and I stared at his unconscious body as I caught my breath, and quickly healed my injuries.

It was still dark, and I was assured I wouldn't be seen as I levitated him out to the street, and into his car. I cleaned up all traces of blood and injury that I could see, leaving the pain in place for him to enjoy upon awakening, shut off the engine, and quietly returned to the house.

When I entered the house, Rachel was standing in the middle of the room, her fingers pressed to her lips. "He hurt your ribs again, didn't he?" She whispered as tears filled her eyes.

"I'm fine, Rachel. He didn't do anything major." I replied quietly.

"Where is he?" She asked, her tone haunted and frightened.

"I put him in his car. My hope is that when he regains consciousness, he will simply leave." I replied, taking my wand from my boot.

"What are you going to do?" She asked curiously, as I pointed it at the door.

"I am going to ward the doors and windows so that he will not be able to enter as long as I am here to maintain them." I replied, warding the door, and moving to the window. "It will at least give us an uninterrupted night's sleep." I informed her as we went from room to room.

"Won't he be able to simply break the glass?" She questioned curiously.

"No. These wards are protection against any form of intrusion. Even another wizard will not be able to breach them without my allowing it." I explained solemnly.

"What about when you're not here?" She asked tremulously.

"As soon as I leave, these wards will fall. He will be able to break in just as he did this evening." I replied regretfully. "I do not know what Muggle means you can employ to assure he can't get in."

"When will you leave?" She whispered softly.

"Soon." I replied. "I have to find my new life, Rachel. I can not stay here. Your ex-husband already assumes more than he should about me, and I feel my continued presence here will only make things worse for you."

"Assumes more than he should?" She questioned, tilting her head in curiosity. "What do you mean?"

"He already assumes that you and I are lovers, simply because of my presence here tonight." I growled lowly. "Though there was proof to the contrary right before his eyes, he chose to see what he wanted to." I explained, gesturing toward my bed. "I don't want to create more trouble for you."

She took a few steps too many within the circle of my comfort zone, and I shifted uneasily from one foot to the other, struggling not to take a step back for every step forward that she made. When she reached for my hand, I swallowed hard, and forced myself to allow her touch.

"I'm sorry that he has made you uncomfortable here with his unfounded assumptions." She stated solemnly, and gently squeezed my hand. "I know you have to go. But, before you do, I want you to know that I appreciate all you've done for Danielle and me. I will never forget you. You will always be welcome here, Severus. Come back any time your feet carry you our way." She stretched up, and softly kissed my cheek before leaving me standing there in the middle of the room.

More than a little disturbed, I returned to my bed, and lie there, my senses on full alert. Thoughts swirled in my brain, refusing to take any form of logic or conclusion. I knew that I had to find my place in this new life, and that I had to move on. But, I didn't know how I could do that, knowing full well the danger that this woman and her daughter were living with. My conscience wouldn't allow me to simply abandon them to their fate now that I had become more involved with them.

Rachel's increasing familiarity with me was extremely disconcerting. I didn't know how I felt about that openness. I wasn't used to being accepted so easily for who and what I am by either wizard or Muggle society. It left me wavering between accepting the change, and retreating into the familiarity of my solitary existence.

With a heavy sigh, I rolled onto my side, and stared across the room, focusing on the window where dim light made it appear lighter than the surrounding walls. A shadow passed by, and I narrowed my eyes in anger. Rachel's ex-husband had regained consciousness. Rather than take the hint and leave, he was choosing to create more turmoil. I slipped from the bed, silent as a ghost, and trailed along with him inside the house. He made his way to the rear of the cottage, and stopped in front of the back door.

I stood in the shadows of the kitchen, and watched as he wrapped a piece of cloth around his fist, and hit the glass. The shards fell silently onto the matt before the door. I waited as he reached through and unlocked the door, smirking when he tried to open the latch. The doorknob rattled furiously as he tried to gain entrance. I could hear his muffled cursing as he struggled to enter the home.

He gave up after several more minutes, and I studied his shadow as he made his way around the house to where Rachel's bedroom is located. I slipped into her room undetected, and gazed at the two of them asleep in the bed, unaware of the man outside trying to intrude. Failing to gain entrance to Rachel's room, he continued around the house, seeking a way to get in. I was nearly laughing out loud in delight when he finally gave up, and made his way back to his car, muttering curses under his breath. I stood at the window until he drove away, then made my way through the house, silently repairing the damage he had done. Rachel and Danielle would be unaware of the potential danger they had been in.

As I laid back in my bed, my thoughts drifted to the woman and child. I was gravely worried for their safety, once I left their home. My wards couldn't hold in my absence, and stronger protections had to come via permission from the Ministry. I was no longer in a position to request the proper permits and licences to perform a full, and lasting ward for them. There was no one I could trust at home to do it for me. Albus, Remus, Mad Eye, even Black…all were gone. Minerva would turn me over to the Ministry without batting an eye. Hagrid would simply crush me first, and ask questions later. I couldn't be sure that any of them would know the truth, despite the fact that I gave those memories to Potter. Did he even look at them? Did he know the truth at all? Would I dare to approach him, and let him know that I had survived? No…even with my appearance unaltered, all of those doors would remain closed to me now. No matter what name I gave on the forms, as soon as I signed them, the letters would re-form to my true identity. Eventually, I fell into a light sleep with none of these issues resolved. In the morning, I would leave, and hope for the best.

Rachel was already awake, and standing before the stove fixing breakfast when I entered the room. I came to a sudden halt, and simply watched her, unaware of my presence. I felt an incredible sense of awareness while gazing upon the scene, as I took my first objective look at her. I don't know if it was caused by the sight of her in her dressing gown, hair down, and spilling over her shoulders while she cooked. Or if it was the fact that she was humming softly, appearing so content and relaxed. I dared not indulge in the thought that I was becoming attracted to her. I had nothing to offer them, and I would not stay, and continue to take advantage of their generosity.

She looked up suddenly, spotting me standing there, and smiled. "Good morning, Severus. Would you like some coffee?"

"Good morning, Rachel. Coffee sounds good." I replied with a smile that seemed to come easier and easier to my face.

"Help yourself. The cups are there to the right of the sink." She gestured over her shoulder as she focused on the eggs, and bacon she was preparing.

"Good morning, Devon." Danielle mumbled sleepily a few moments later as she came and sat at the table with me.

"Good morning, child." I murmured quietly. "Did you sleep well?" She nodded in silence, her eyes still half-closed in slumber. I looked away only to see Rachel solemnly regarding the two of us. I tilted my head questioningly, and was shocked to see tears fill her eyes. I quickly came to my feet, and stood beside her. "What is it, Rachel, that has you in tears?" I whispered, mindful of the child at the table behind us.

"Eddie…used to snap at her to sit up, and pay attention…very cruel." She whispered back, and swallowed hard. "It was wonderful to see someone who would accept the fact that she is one of those people who has to wake slowly. Thank you for being so patient with her."

"Would he also slap at her in those times?" I couldn't help but ask as my mind jolted to the past.

"Oh yes. He'd cuff her a good one when he told her to sit up." Rachel replied, her tears beginning to spill from her eyes.

"I understand more than you know, Rachel." I murmured quietly, surprised to find that I trusted her enough to reveal a bit of my past. "My father was very much the same way."

She nodded, wiping at her eyes as she turned back to the stove. I dared to reach out, and give her shoulder a gentle squeeze. She drew a shuddering breath as she began to dish the food onto our plates. I poured glasses of juice, and a cup of coffee for the two of us.

We ate in near silence. Conversation was strained, and centred around my leaving. I struggled within myself, wanting to be assured of their safety, and yet, determined to push on and find a life for myself.

When Danielle had finished her meal, Rachel sent her off to get ready for the day, and I took the opportunity to speak more openly with her mother. "I wish there were more I could do for the two of you." I confessed gently. "Is there anything that I could possibly take care of before I go? Any repairs that need tending to? I would be willing to fix the place up if there is need."

"I can't get over this power you have!" She exclaimed with a breathless laugh. "So many times I've wished I could do what you're capable of doing. I think I'm jealous!"

I didn't know what to say to that, so I merely smiled, and felt uncomfortable in my own skin. This woman rattled me, and she had since I first spoke with her the night she came into my life. There was something about her that had kept her present in the back of my mind for the past two years. Something that held both of them there, and I couldn't explain what that was or why it held me captive.

I was around the back side of the house, surreptitiously repairing some loose clapboards, and repairing the window frames, when Rachel came around the side of the house, carrying a plate of food, and a tall glass of lemonade.

"Time for a break, Severus." She announced, standing beside me, and handing the glass over. "I made you a couple of sandwiches. I thought you might be getting hungry. You've been working all morning."

"Thank you. I was feeling a bit hungry." I replied, taking another drink of the cool, tart liquid. "This is very good."

"Thanks. Why don't we take a seat on the swing? It's shady over there." She suggested, and I followed along behind her. When we had settled, she watched me for a few moments as I tucked into my lunch. "Will you stay one more day, Severus?" She quietly asked, her green-eyed gaze piercing me to my soul.

I swallowed my food, and carefully thought of my answer. "Why would you want me to stay? Nothing will change if I do." I replied, a bit harshly to my ears, but she didn't seem to take offence.

"The truth?" She questioned with a tilt of her head, and a strange look in her eyes.

"Only the truth, Rachel. Always." I replied, fixing my gaze upon her face.

"I like your quiet presence, your strength, the order you have brought to our lives. I feel safe, and protected, having you here to look out for Danielle and me." She replied simply. "If you stay for just one more day, I feel that, somehow, I will be able to overcome this trial I'm facing in my life."

I drew a sharp breath, shocked by her forthright reasoning, and I was more than a bit alarmed. I found myself fighting an overwhelming urge to flee, and an incredible desire to stay.

When she reached up, and pushed away the hair that was hiding my face, I was suddenly struggling with desire of a different sort. Her touch was gentle, and I didn't fail to notice that she didn't hesitate to touch me in the least. She was becoming increasingly familiar with me, and I wasn't sure whether or not I welcomed that closeness. I had been alone for so long, I closed my eyes, not knowing how to react in any other way.

"Will you stay, Severus?" She whispered so softly, I barely heard her over the leaves rustling on the trees, or the blood roaring in my ears. She caressed my cheek, gently forcing me to look her in the eye. "Please?"

When I opened my eyes, she looked deeply into them, surely seeing the doubt, the desire, and the battle that was raging within myself. She was a beautiful woman, and she seemed to be asking for so much more than one more day with me.

The look in her eyes shifted, and I held my breath as she drew nearer. I knew she was going to kiss me, but I was helpless to stop her. Her kiss was the sweetest I had ever experienced in my life. Not even the awkward, innocent, attempts Lily and I had shared so long ago were as pure. With a low moan, I tangled my fingers in her hair, and allowed the kiss to deepen.

I was the first to break away, and I pressed my forehead to hers. When I could speak at last, my voice was roughened by desire. "I'm sorry." I closed my eyes, and swallowed hard. "I shouldn't have allowed that to happen. Forgive me."

She stood suddenly, and looked flustered, and ashamed. "No, I'm sorry, Severus. I shouldn't have been so forward. I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry." She whispered, and fled into the house.

I remained there for a very long time, thinking over the best way to deal with the unexpected event. I didn't know how I was going to make her see that she had done nothing wrong as far as I was concerned. She had to see that I had nothing to offer her at this point in time, and I wouldn't allow myself to consider anything more than friendship with anyone. She obviously wanted more than friendship, but assumed that I wasn't of the same mind. With my mind made up, and settled on the matter, I picked up the plate and glass she had left on the swing when she fled, and made my way into the house.

She was seated at the table in the kitchen, staring into space, while she spun a glass of lemonade idly in her grasp. I put the plate and my glass in the sink, and came to sit across the corner of the table from her. She looked up when I leaned over to capture her attention. "You left before I could answer your question." I stated solemnly. "Does your request still stand?"

"Yes, it does." She answered quietly, a strange light shining in her eyes. "Do you want to stay for one more day?"

"Yes, I do, because we need to talk, Rachel. I still feel as if I never should have allowed that kiss to happen, but I think I owe you an explanation as to why I feel that way." I stated calmly, and continued. "After Danielle has gone to sleep tonight, I wish to discuss several matters with you. There are things you need to know and understand be…before anything like that can or will happen again."


End file.
